Tim Quote #305
Quote from Tim in Birds of a Feather Flock to Taylor
Eddie: Oh, don't listen to that old windbag. Listen, I was married for 45 years, and the one thing I learned was that men and women are different.
Hick: It took him 45 years to figure that out.
Eddie: Oh. All I'm saying is that women are subtle. Your wife probably told you about this evening in her own way.
Tim: No, absolutely not, if she'd told me, I would have remembered that.
Eddie: Think, think. She never said anything about a fundraiser?
Tim: No, no. She said, "I'm gonna dry-clean your tuxedo," and something about Saturday hors d'oeuvres. That was it.
Eddie: But I mean written something down on paper or a calendar?
Tim: Well, our calendar is circled on Saturday, but all she wrote was "fur raisins".
Eddie: Fur raisins? Fur... Could that be... "fundraiser"?
Tim: Oh, no.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Birds of a Feather Flock to Taylor’ Quotes
Quote from Jill
Jill: Well, I don't think he listens to me at all. I told him about this event that we're going to three times, and he acts like I never said anything.
Wilson: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Jill: I don't know how I could have been clearer. I told him I was getting his tux cleaned. I told him about the hors d'oeuvres we were having Saturday night. I even circled it on the calendar. I did everything except sit him down and say, "Tim, we are going to a fundraiser Saturday night." Oh God, I never did that. Oh, man! I can't believe it. All of this arguing, and he was right. Oh, no. I feel terrible. This is all my fault. Well, I should apologize to him. Thank you, Wilson. You've really been a big help. [goes back inside]
Wilson: Hmm. Somehow it's always easier with Jill.
Quote from Tim
Tim: Welcome to Tool Time. This is Al over here.
Hick: Oh, we know Al.
Eddie: Oh, we love Al.
Tim: Oh, we all love Al.
Eddie: Hey, Al, come on, give us one of them big salutes. [Al salutes]
Audience: [chants] Al, Al, Al, Al, Al...
Tim: Hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. I don't want to disturb this love fest you have going here, but let me remind you of something: Al is my assistant. He assists me.
Quote from Wilson
Jill: Do you think that Tim is a good listener?
Wilson: Yes, I think Tim is a very good listener.
Jill: But does he understand everything you say?
Wilson: I think Tim is a very good listener.