Randy Quote #255
Quote from Randy in Engine and a Haircut, Two Fights
Jill: I'm not talking about your father. I'm talking about me. I was the best Juliet ever at the Hockaday School for Girls. I was also their best Othello.
Randy: I'm sure you were a very convincing black man.
Jill: I'd be happy to rehearse lines with you.
Randy: No offense, Mom, but if I'm gonna play a love scene, I'd rather not do it with someone who was around when the play was written.
Jill: I only hope that you look as good as I do when you're 350 years old.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Engine and a Haircut, Two Fights’ Quotes
Quote from Randy
Wilson: "Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet."
Jill: Well, I guess I'm the one that's no longer a Capulet. Apparently, I've been replaced.
Randy: No, you haven't. I was just out here rehearsing with Wilson so I'd be good enough to rehearse with you.
Wilson: Jill, I am so sorry. I had no idea I was usurping your role.
Jill: Oh, come on. You've had your eye on this part all week.
Wilson: Now, that is not true! Young Randy came out here and beseeched me to step into the role.
Jill: You beseeched him?
Randy: I didn't beseech anybody! I don't even know what "beseech" means.
Quote from Wilson
Randy: "When he bestrides the lazy puffing clouds and floats upon the bosom of the air."
Wilson: "O Romeo, Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo? Deny thy father and refuse thy name."
Randy: Oh, Wilson. I gotta tell you you're a much better Juliet than Mom.
Wilson: Well, thank you, young Randy. I wouldn't want to disparage another actor, but at the Greenville School for Boys, I was known as quite a breathtaking Juliet. And it wasn't easy playing a love scene opposite that pimple-faced Herman Dilbert. You know, I got nothing from him. It was like acting with a head of lettuce.
Randy: Wilson, could we?
Quote from Randy
Randy: I don't know. One of those kids has been the lead in all the school plays.
Jill: But I'll bet that he doesn't come from a theatrical family.
Randy: I hate to break this to you, Mom, but Tool Time isn't exactly great theater. Even though it does usually end in tragedy.