Tim: Did I get any beer on you? Sorry, lady. Hey! It's autumn. The leaves are changing. The weather's changing. Brr. The only thing that's not changing is Al's personality.
Al: My fan mail, which incidentally exceeds yours by ten to one, indicates that people like me just about the way I am. [audience applauds]
Tim: Ten to one, Al, huh? Ten to one. Your mom must be getting writer's cramp.