Lorelai: The problem is that everything I write sounds so schmucky.
Rory: I'm sure that's not true. We're running low on cranberries.
Lorelai: "Luke Danes is a highly regarded member of this community. Not an ill word can be spoken of Mr. Danes." It's like I'm some documentary narrator from the History Channel. And you know what phrase I keep using? "Stand-up." "Luke Danes is a stand-up guy. He's an upstanding member of Stars Hollow, a real stand-up citizen." People are gonna think he's turned into a comedian.