Ray Quote #1886
Quote from Ray in Golf for It
Ray: Wait a minute, Robert. I- I don't think you're taking every factor into consideration. You're forgetting a very special little lady named Debra. You think Ma wants to spend the rest of her life under the same roof with her arch-nemesis? Not likely. But whose wife does she love? Whose wife does she just think is the cat's bananas?
Robert: Look, don't bring our wives--
Ray: Yeah, that's right! It's Amy! Precious little Amy. So, you can put Ma in the middle of that room. As soon as she gets one look at Amy, she's gonna come scamperin' over to you tongue out and tail a-waggin'!
Everybody Loves Raymond Quotes
‘Golf for It’ Quotes
Quote from Robert
Ray: We don't even have to do this, 'cause like you said before, Ma loves me more!
Robert: Well, you know what? She can love you all she wants, because I love her more than you do.
Ray: What?
Robert: You heard me. I love Ma more.
Ray: Are you insane?
Robert: Deep down inside, Raymond, you know it's true.
Ray: Are you saying that I don't love my mother?
Robert: Not as much as me. You take her for granted. But me? I cherish every ounce of affection that woman gives me because I have to fight for it like a dirty dog in the street. But you? You don't even have to try. She makes it so easy for you. You're just a fat kid sittin' with his mouth open at the end of a chocolate assembly line. You disgust me. I'm gettin' Ma.
Quote from Robert
Ray: She can't stay in my house. There's not enough room!
Robert: Oh, come on, you've got plenty of room downstairs in your office there. Just put in a nice rug, and put up a big picture of you and her together. Oh, she'll be very happy.
Ray: Okay, so, since you're too stubborn to move into that house, like we all know is your destiny, you're gonna force your own mother to live in a basement, huh? A dark, disgusting basement with the rats and the cockroaches.
Robert: Raymond, Raymond, Raymond. Don't fight it. Who do you think she'd rather be with? We all know that you're the favorite. And that, my friend is your destiny.
Ray: You are out of your mind! She loves us both equally.
Robert: [laughs] Oh, yeah, right!
Ray: Okay!
Robert: All right. All right. I'll tell you what: Why don't we do this: we'll put her in the middle of the room, call her name and see who she comes to.
Quote from Ray
Robert: Here you go, Ma.
Marie: Oh, my goodness!
Ray: Yeah. Listen, Ma, we're sorry. We shouldn't have yelled at you.
Robert: Yeah, we felt bad all day.
Marie: Oh, you shouldn't have. You're the best sons any mother could hope for. [kisses Ray & Robert]
Frank: Why do I suddenly want jelly doughnuts?
Marie: Oh, these shelves are so beautiful. And flowers!
Robert: Glad you like 'em, Mom. Sorry they weren't ready in time for Lee and Stan.
Marie: Oh, that doesn't matter. Come on, you're gonna carry these shelves over to Lee's house right now.
Ray: Okay. All right, Ma. Pick it up. Oh, by the way, Deb, I beat Robert at golf, so when Dad dies, Mom's gonna live with us.