Debra: This is what I don't understand. You're always making fun of my cooking, but I finally make something you like and you're still making jokes about it. Why?
Ray: I'm a complicated person. Oh, come on, it's just that's who I am. I make fun of the wife a little. "Oh, here's Ray. Ray, what did she do to you last night?" And if I say, "She made some braciole and it was quite tasty," wha- who wants to hang out with that guy?
Debra: But don't you think that there's something wrong that the only way you can be popular is at my expense?
Ray: I wish there was another way.
Debra: All right-
Ray: Aw, come on. I'm kidding. Hey look, we know the score here. You got it all over me, right? You're the pretty, smart, together, good one. I'm the one they say, "How did he get her?" So I don't know, maybe in my stupid way, I'm telling them how. You know, "She can't cook. Ha ha." [forced laughter] What? It could be worse. You know Chuck Wilson? You know what he told me? He said his wife is so cold, when he gets into bed with her, he has to shoo away the penguins. Shoo away the penguins. That's cold. Wilson's wife. And yet I don't think any less of her.