TV Quotes

Mr. Feeny: I'm the principal, Mr. Hunter. I wield great and mysterious powers.

Alan: I had a dream last night. Skinny little men in brand new rock climbing shoes falling off a mountain screaming at me, "You sold me these, you merchant of death!"

Alan: Your brother's discovered girls, he can't sit still. When you're Eric's age and you can't sit still, I'll take Morgan. It's the endless cycle of fishing.
Cory: And what about after Morgan?
Alan: Well, then I'll just be some guy in a fishing hat with a lot of boring stories.

Eric: Two passes to Sliding Rapids Mountain. Excellent.
Alan: Yep, you and your brother should have a blast.
Eric: Ah, no, no, no. See, when I look at this ticket I see someone in a skimpy wet bikini.
Alan: Well, that's entirely up to Cory.