Lucille Quote #115

Quote from Lucille in Switch Hitter

Michael: Please, Stan Sitwell's coming over.
Lucille: That hairless freak is coming here? None of his hair is real, you know.
Gob: You mean the guy we're meeting with can't even grow his own hair? Come on!
Michael: It's called alopecia, and I'd appreciate it if we could all be sensitive to it, okay? He happens to be a very modest and generous man.
Lucille: Modest and generous? Then why is he always waving giant $10 million checks over his head every time some-
Michael: Go ahead, Mom. Finish your thought. "Every time some children's hospital needs funding"?
Lucille: Nonetheless, we could get a giant checkbook too. We're just not that starved for attention.


 ‘Switch Hitter’ Quotes

Quote from Lucille

Lucille: Get me a vodka, rocks.
Michael: Mom, it's breakfast.
Lucille: And a piece of toast.

Quote from Maeby

Maeby: How 'bout I come with you? I mean, I could help you prepare.
Tobias: Yes, well, it's for a con man, which I don't think you know anything about. And besides, don't you have school?
Maeby: No. Um... Today is "Help Your Dad Follow His Dream" day.
Tobias: [chuckles] Great. We can take the carpool lane.

Quote from Maeby

Maeby: How do you think I feel? He said he would help me on this essay for The Old Man and the Sea.
Michael: I'll help you with that later.
Maeby: Oh, great. Okay. So you have to read this, and then explain it and, this is important, say it in my own words, okay? Smart, but not too smart. Let's have a four-syllable max.