Waitress: Hello. Would you like something from the bar?
Dick: Uh, yes. I'll have a glass of Merlot, and a Chardonnay for the lady who will be joining me. Oh, and, uh can we establish something first? You are, I assume, expecting a tip?
Waitress: Well... yes.
Dick: Yep. All right. Now, this pile of one-dollar bills represents your potential tip. Every time you please me, you'll see the pile grow. However, if I am unsatisfied - if you're slow, mouthy, or sneeze into your hands - you'll notice the pile shrinking. Agreed?
Waitress: Yes, I guess.
Dick: All right. Good luck. [shakes her hand]