Mary: Come on, don't tell me you're not excited about the homecoming weekend. You know, between the Pendelton Badgers and Ohio Western Mustangs.
Dick: Oh, it's football. Everywhere I turn, it's football, football, big, fat shmutball.
Mary: Well, forgive me, Mr. Intellectual. God forbid you should come down from your ivory tower for four quarters.
Dick: Four quarters? I don't care what you pay me, I'm not going.