Tahani Quote #58
Quote from Tahani in Team Cockroach
[flashback:]
Veronique: Tahani Al-Jamil, social activist, philanthropist, neck model and now cover girl for "International Sophisticate Magazine." Tahani, welcome.
Tahani: Oh, it's such an honor. I have long dreamt of being one of the women or yachts who grace your cover.
Veronique: Let's begin with your sister, Kamilah. A woman who... as you know... was offered the spot on our cover, but turned it down.
Tahani: I actually didn't know that. Please, carry on.
Veronique: Well, next week, Kamilah will travel to Cleveland, Ohio to become the youngest person ever inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame. Remarkable.
Tahani: Is there a question?
Veronique: Don't you find that remarkable?
Tahani: Kamilah is very impressive. As you know, she released her debut album only six months ago and yet, the critics thought it was so brilliant that the Hall of Fame decided to waive its 25 year waiting period. Sadly, I will not be attending the ceremony because I will be in Haiti on a relief mission. Perhaps we should talk more about that.
Veronique: Perhaps we should. But first, another question about Kamilah. Don't you think she and I would be friends? We have a lot in common, we are both Capricorn, and we're both only children. I'm sorry, I forgot about you.
The Good Place Quotes
‘Team Cockroach’ Quotes
Quote from Michael
Eleanor: If you're not human, why do you look like us?
Michael: Everyone in the Bad Place Bureau of Human Affairs gets randomly assigned a human body so we can get the feel of how best to torture you. I gotta say, it took me a long time to get used to the hanging bits.
Eleanor: Gross.
Michael: Oh, get your mind out of the gutter, Eleanor. I was talking about my testicles.
Quote from Tahani
Chidi: Anyone have any ideas?
Tahani: You know, believe it or not, I actually found myself in a very similar situation a few years ago, except in that instance, Michael was Javier Bardem and the Bad Place was Vanessa Redgrave's panic room.
Eleanor: Okay, stop talking. Do not talk again for 100 hours.
Quote from Jason
Eleanor: What do we do?
Jason: We team up with Michael.
Eleanor: Okay, hot take, but I like your confidence. Tell me why.
Jason: He has a bow tie.
Eleanor: Oh, no.
Jason: I always trust dudes in bow ties. Once, this guy in a bow tie came up to me at the gun range in a Jacksonville bus station and said he'd give me $600 if I put these weird turtles in my duffle bag and brought them to Daytona Beach. So I hotwired a swamp boat to Daytona and the guy paid me the $600. My point is, you always trust dudes in bow ties.
[Eleanor slaps the lollipop out of Jason's mouth]