Carlton: Well, can't we at least move me to another part of the hospital? I've got a reputation to worry about.
What if I want to run for a political office?
Nurse: Well, now, I'll tell you the same thing I told the last person that asked me that question: Just say you didn't inhale.
Will: Listen, listen, somehow we're missing each other. I mean, does he look like a drug addict?
Nurse: Do I?
Will: Can we stick to the subject, please?
Nurse: Listen, sweetie, the first time I came into this hospital it was on a stretcher. Hell, I've been from Yale to jail, and from Park Avenue to park bench but now I'm clean and sober.
Carlton: That's really touching... but do you think you can get me a nurse without a record?
Nurse: [chuckles] I like him. Try and help him to stick around.