Donna: Ok, so just out of curiosity, no reason, what was your first time like?
[montage:]
Midge: Oh. My first time was with a guy named... Your father.
Laurie: My first time was with this guy named Darren. It was really special. Oh, no. Wait. It wasn't Darren. It was... Robert? I think Robert.
Kitty: Well, um... Red and I waited until after we were married. Like, five seconds after we were married. We said, "To heck with the receiving line," and hit the nearest closet. [laughs]
Midge: Oh, I remember running my hands through his long, blond hair, and listening to his beautiful British accent. You see, because back then, your father was blond and British.
Laurie: No, no, no. Not Robert. There was this guy. What was his name? Or was it his brother? It'll come to me.
Kitty: Good God, that dress must've had a hundred buttons down the back, but Red got it off in no time. You wouldn't know it to look at him, but Red's got very nimble fingers. Nim-ble!
Midge: I just remember it was very disappointing, and I never saw that guy again. I mean, your father. I mean, your father was the first. Don't tell your father, okay?
Laurie: I want to say Billy. But that's not right. Anyway, I just remember that he wasn't very good.
Kitty: And it was just wonderful... Eventually.