Jerry Quote #538
Quote from Jerry in The Bubble Boy
[stand-up:]
Jerry: There's something very scary and exciting about fire. People always run to see a fire. They're proud if they have a fire place. I think that's what smoking is really all about. That's the power of smoking. It's just this thing, "I got fire right here in my hand. Smoke and fire is literally coming right out of my mouth." And it's very intimidating to the nonsmoker. Because it's like talking to someone going: "My head could open up. Lava could explode out. Pour right down my face. Doesn't bother me a bit." And a cigar is even worse. A cigar is like, "You think this end is bad. Look at this wet, disgusting, chewed-up nub, huh? How scary is that?"
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Bubble Boy’ Quotes
Quote from George
Donald: [o.s.] Okay, history. This is for the game. How you doing over there? Not too good.
George: All right, bubble boy. Let's just play. "Who invaded Spain in the 8th century?"
Donald: That's a joke. The Moors.
George: Oh, no. I'm so sorry. It's the "Moops". The correct answer is, the "Moops".
Donald: Moops? Let me see that. [takes card with gloved hand] That's not Moops, you jerk. That's Moors. It's a misprint.
George: I'm sorry. The card says Moops.
Donald: It doesn't matter. It's Moors. There's no Moops.
George: It's Moops.
Quote from Jerry
Mel Sanger: Excuse me. Anyway, we were watching you on TV.
Jerry: You get in the bubble with him?
Mel Sanger: No. He can see through the bubble. It's plastic.
Jerry: Oh, I thought it was like an igloo.
Mel Sanger: No, it's clear.
Jerry: Ah-ha.
Elaine: Who has the remote?
Mel Sanger: He does.
Elaine: The remote goes through the bubble?
Mel Sanger: Yeah, he's in the bubble with the remote.
Jerry: So you have no control over the remote?
Mel Sanger: No, it's frustrating.
Quote from Jerry
[stand-up:]
Jerry: Have you ever called someone up and you're disappointed when they answer the phone? You wanted the machine! You know, and you're always kind of thrown off. You go, "Oh, I didn't know you were there. I just wanted to leave you a message saying, 'Sorry I missed you.'" So here what we have is two people hate each other, don't ever really want to talk, but the phone machine is like this relationship respirator keeping these marginal, brain-dead relationships alive. And we all do it. Why? So that when we come home, you can see that little flashing red light. All right, messages. See, people need that. It's very important for human beings to feel popular and well-liked amongst a large group of people we don't care for.