Nick: "Pepperwood lay on the ground in a puddle of blood. Jessica Night broke through the barricades and ran to his side. 'Even though he doesn't have muscles, he seems incredibly strong,' Jessica thought, as she looked into his perfect, sexy face. Even now, even covered in the blood of the man they both knew as Schmith,
the two sat in silence in the hot, New Orleans night, waiting for the words that would never come." [audience whoops and cheers]
Nick: I'm gonna open up the floor to some questions. Uh, the young lady right here in the strange-looking vest. No offense.
Girl: When are Pepperwood and Jessica Night going to get together?
Nick: That is a great question. [audience muttering] I'll just cut to it, guys. Uh, Pepperwood and Jessica Night will never get together. Never. [low murmuring] I'm sorry. You guys, stop. It's just, look, these characters, they-they are based off real people. A-And the real people are just fundamentally different. They don't work together. It's just never gonna happen. You just got to forget about it.
Jess: Excuse me. [runs out]
Nick: Move on from it. And also, you know, Pepperwood, he blew it. Sometimes you don't get another chance, you know, to-to fix the mistake. It's just... look, adult relationships are really complicated. So, let's hear it for books! [silence] All right, wow, you guys are super intense.