Wilson Quote #322

Quote from Wilson in Communication Breakdown

Wilson: Actually, the I Ching is the ancient book of Chinese wisdom. You ask a question about your life. And then you toss these coins. And you try to divine the answer from the book.
Tim: I've got a question for those coins.
Wilson: Mmm. Shoot.
Tim: You think I'm too tough on my kids?
Wilson: Might I inquire what brings that issue to the fence?
Tim: In a word? Jill. She says I should be more sensitive about how I discipline my kids.
Wilson: Well, it's true the way you talk to your children now can have a profound effect on your future relationship.

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 ‘Communication Breakdown’ Quotes

Quote from Tim

Tim: Hey, Wilson.
Wilson: Hidey-ho, neighbor.
Tim: What are you doing over there?
Wilson: Tim, are you familiar with the I Ching?
Tim: Sure. The "I Ching," the scratching, the chafing. That's why I switched to boxers, my friend.
Wilson: Oh, my!

Quote from Tim

Tim: Now, this is like an automated doll house. Of course Al would have an automated dull house.
Al: Well, what would be so great about your automated house?
Tim: Yeah? I'll show you. In my house, let's say I want my plants to have perfect sun, all right? Press this plant icon, and my house rotates from a northern exposure to a beautiful sunny western exposure.
Al: Well, I wouldn't want to be living in a spinning house.
Tim: Who invited ya? Now, here's a good one. Let's say your neighbors put on a two-story addition, you can't even see the stockyards anymore. Press this. And your house rises to the occasion. "When you go get the paper, honey, watch that first step. It's a mean one."
Al: This feature is also good for keeping away pesky door-to-door salesmen. [laughs]
Tim: And speaking of keeping people away from you... You know, when the mother-in-law comes to visit you, perfect opportunity to use the automated house. She's not getting in here. No way. [the house disappears below the ground and a "Lot for sale" sign springs up]

Quote from Delores

[Harry walks in on Delores hugging Tim]
Harry: Tim? What are you doing here?
Tim: Well, certainly not what it looks like.
Delores: He came over because he's a caring, loving human being who recognizes the importance of family unity.
Harry: Are you drunk?
Delores: I'm gonna leave you two alone. Now, try and open that thick skull of yours and listen to what he has to say. He's a lot smarter than he looks.