Tim Quote #432
Quote from Tim in Groin Pains
Tim: You gotta wear tights if you fly, it's an FAA regulation. It's aerodynamic or something.
Randy: Yeah, but I'm not gonna fly.
Tim: What do you mean, you're not gonna fly? You gotta fly. You're the Pan man, man.
Randy: Yeah, well, Mrs. Mellor says I'm supposed to, like, prance.
Tim: Oh, boy. Oh, boy. No, no, no! No, stop doing... Don't do that! No! Men don't prance. We walk, we run, we s...
skip if no one's looking, we jump, that sort of stuff. But we don't ever, ever, prance.
Home Improvement Quotes
‘Groin Pains’ Quotes
Quote from Tim
Mark: Do you have to go to the bathroom, Dad?
Tim: I don't think I... I don't think I'm ever gonna go to the bathroom again. Oh!
Mark: What happened?
Tim: I pulled my groin.
Mark: What's that?
Tim: My very favorite muscle.
Quote from Wilson
Tim: Well, Wilson, I'm confused. You know, I'm carrying this trunk of books and I find out she likes these books about all these guys with rippling muscles, you know, so I wanted to, you know, show her my rippling muscles and these guys end up carrying women off upstairs to ecstasy and I pull a groin muscle.
Wilson: Well, Tim, Tim, Tim, I think you've got something over these young guys.
Tim: You do?
Wilson: Uh-huh. Yes, it's best summed up in an ancient Chinese proverb. It goes: [speaks Chinese]
Tim: W-w-wait, wait... Is that Peking dialect?
Wilson: I am so sorry, Tim. It may lose a bit in the translation, but it goes: "A great lover is not one who romances a different woman every night. A great lover is one who romances the same woman for a lifetime."
Tim: That's something to think about, isn't it? Is there anything you don't know, Wilson?
Wilson: I don't know.
Quote from Al
Tim: What happened is I pulled a groin muscle yesterday at home. I went to the doc's this morning. He said I'm not supposed to lift anything heavy. So we have to change the format of the show a little bit today. You're gonna have to do all the work.
Al: And what would the change be, Tim?