Tim Quote #388

Quote from Tim in Read My Hips

Tim: Come on, Jill. I don't go out with these guys every night. What's making you so angry?
Jill: I am angry because you said you were going to be home in 15 minutes and then you weren't. Because I'm flirting with you like crazy on the phone and you didn't even notice. And most of all, because I went to all this trouble for nothing. I spent the whole evening by myself, and now you're stuck with a plate of cold food.
Tim: Oh, don't worry about me, I ate at the bar. [Jill walks off] Well, wait, wait, wait, wait. I didn't have dessert.

Rate

 ‘Read My Hips’ Quotes

Quote from Jill

Jill: Why don't you just ever tune in to me?
Tim: What am I supposed to do? Read your mind? At least when I want something, it's pretty clear what it is I want.
Jill: Well, that's true, Tim. Your signals are real clear. You crush a beer can on your head, that means, "I need another one." You belch... [belches] that's, "I'm done." And, "Honey, I took a shower," that's, "Wake up, I'm ready."

Quote from Al

Tim: Thank you very much and welcome to Tool Time. I'm your host, of course, Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor, and you all know my assistant Al "I can't find a better job" Borland. [chuckles] Anyway, all this week Al and I will be doin' our salute to safety, 'cause, after all, Al, a safe workplace is a happy workplace. Right?
Al: I wouldn't know, Tim.

Quote from Tim

Tim: Safety on the job site is a priority. That's why proper equipment is essential. Custom-designed hard hat. [hits Al's hard hat] And proper safety goggles to protect your eyes from unexpected objects. [Al blocks Tim's hand as he goes for his goggles] Anyway, these goggles are specially coated to reduce glare and prevent scratching. [scratches Al's goggles]
Al: And they're vented for your added comfort.
Tim: And so is Al. Anyway, the important thing here is safety on the job site. And safety starts at a little spot right here. You must have direct and clear communication between your coworkers. Al, look out! See? See? Had this been a real emergency, Al would be safe because I gave him a clear and direct signal. And as Al's coworker, I'm concerned with his safety. Just as Al is concerned with mine. Right, Al?
Al: What's your point, Tim?
Tim: Good direct question. My point is, I don't think women are as clear with their signals as men. I know they're not. On a job site, for instance, if a man holds up a stop sign, he means, "Hey, stop there!" If a woman holds up the stop sign... If she designed this, it'd say: "If you really knew me, you'd know what you should do right now."