Tim Quote #21

Quote from Tim in Mow Better Blues

Tim: All right, son. This is an ordinary lawn tractor and we have to Tim-Taylorize it. So first we gotta remove this puny 12 1/2-horse Blade-O-Matic motor, 'cause we wanna cut lawn maintenance time way down. So what do we need?
Mark: More power.
Tim: You learn well, my little one. We're gonna replace it with this. Because this is more power.
Mark: Wow.
Tim: Darn right, "wow." This is a twin-cylinder 1600cc motorcycle engine, normally aspirated at 58 horsepower. Your dad has ported and polished it, blueprinted the crank, and balanced it all the way through. Huh? It's got a reverse gear - who needs it? four forward gears and a suicide clutch. On a good, clear day, the ET on this bad boy should be under 15 seconds at quarter of a mile. We can do zero to 60 in under 5.5 seconds.
Mark: You gonna race it?
Tim: You bet. As soon as we install this bad boy, we're gonna enter the Indianapolis 500. By the time the rest of the pack catches us, we'll have won the race and mowed the infield.

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 ‘Mow Better Blues’ Quotes

Quote from Jill

Tim: That wrench has gotta be around here someplace. You know, it just didn't get up and walk away, Jill.
Jill: OK, you're right. I'm ready to talk. I sneak down here at night, take all your tools, go out to the backyard, put 'em in a big pile, and dance around 'em naked.
Tim: What time would that be?
Jill: Sometime right after you go to sleep.

Quote from Al

Tim: Well, Al, now that we have the fitting in place between the two sections of pipe. What's the next step?
Al: Well, Tim, we'll be sweating the pipe.
Tim: Will we?
Al: That's right.
Tim: So we'll put a little deodorant right there in the elbow?
Al: I don't think so, Tim.

Quote from Jill

Tim: Come on. Stand up.
Jill: Stand up?
Tim: Stand up. Put your right arm up. Put your left arm... [Jill chuckles] Put your left arm on the tool.
Jill: The wrench?
Tim: The wrench.