Ray Quote #34
Ray: Oh, no.
Debra: What is it?
Ray: I was daydreaming and now I can't remember if I shampooed my hair or not.
Debra: So? Do it again.
Ray: I can't because if I washed already and do it again, my hair is gonna be too fluffy.
Debra: So don't do it again.
Ray: Well, what if I didn't do it? Then it's gonna be too oily. [off Debra's look] What? This is important.
Debra: Oh, yeah, it's a real crisis. You want me to call in sick for you today, Ray?
Ray: Oh, I'm weird? How about the time you didn't want to go outside because you thought your haircut made your butt look fat? I'm the weird one?
[After Debra turns the tap and sneaks out of the bathroom, Ray screams and falls out of the shower.]
Quote from Ray
Debra: You know what? I have been holding this in all day: There is no way that you are smarter than me.
Ray: Smarter than I.
Debra: All right, what's the name of the 18th-century poet who wrote A Modest Proposal, huh? Huh?
Ray: Oh, yeah? What's the name of the Twilight Zone where the astronauts meet the giant lady?
Debra: Okay, who's the first woman to win a Nobel Prize?
Ray: How much does Mickey Rooney weigh on the moon?
Debra: What's a petit four?
Ray: What's a wedgie?
Debra: When you first met me, was my hair long or short?
Ray: I know one thing for sure. It was blonde. Oh, that wasn't you. Well, I broke up with her then to go out with you. I'll just sleep on the couch.
Quote from Debra
Linda: Why is Ray so depressed? It was just a test.
Debra: Well, I guess seeing in black and white that I'm smarter just blew out his self-esteem. I mean, I'm trying to make him feel better, but nothing works.
Linda: Oh, come on. You had to know you were smarter.
Debra: Oh, of course. But I still feel guilty.