Tom: Actually, Carla, there's a good chance he could get custody, if he can prove you're an unfit mother.
Nick Tortelli: Thank you, Counsellor. And who do you think they're gonna pick? Me, a sincere, hard-working family man? Or you, a hard-up waitress, who leaves her kids night after night to come to a sleazy bar?
Sam: Hey, hey, watch it.
Coach: Yeah, she's off Thursday nights.
Nick Tortelli: I can also prove that you consort with men of questionable character.
Carla: What are you talking about? You got the morals of a sewer rat.
Nick Tortelli: Not to worry. If you knew your law, you would have read up on a thing in the Bill of Rights called the double standard.
Coach: Yeah, watch the bureaucrats take that away from us, too.
Carla: You're bluffing. Court costs money, you know. And unless the TV repair has increased dramatically, you make diddle.
Nick Tortelli: You know, every time you open your mouth, you show your ignorance. It so happens, that the Tortelli Television Hospital has just come off a record-breaking quarter. I want to tell you how good we're doing, I got ten men working under me, and two of them is American.