Michael: How did it come to this? I was just trying to do of something innovative and different that would improve the way we make humans' lives miserable for eternity.
Jason: Mm, well...
Michael: Shut up. What are my options? Do I have any? I mean, I can't go along with her plan. It'll be a spectacular failure. But I can't ignore her or she'll rat me out to Shawn. I'm trapped.
Jason: You're saying a lot of words right now, and I only know some of them, like "rat" and "Jason". But I know a little wisdom I can give you.
Michael: I know everything that happened in your life, and it was all stupid, so I highly doubt that.
Jason: I was a member of a 60-person dance crew in Jacksonville. We were called "Dance Dance Resolution: We Resolve To Dance". One day, Donkey Doug and I got into a fight because I'd framed his girlfriend for boogie board theft, so he started a new dance crew called Hashtag DougLife and immediately challenged us to a dance-off. He said, "Meet us inside the abandoned orange juice factory at midnight." That night, as the clock struck 12:00, me and my crew came together with a determination we had never shown before and slashed all their tires. It was dope. The end. By Jason Mendoza.
Michael: You know, that inane story actually contains a bit of good advice. Thank you, Jason.
Jason: You got it, homey. I give good advice. Guess that's why I'm in the Good Place.