Craig: Hey, boys, what do you say the four of us have a giant tickle party?! [closes door] Okay, that was just a cover I didn't want to alarm your parents.
Malcolm: What's going on?
Craig: I need you guys to teach me how to fight. There's this jerk who's always picking on me, and I'm sick of it.
Reese: Why are you asking us?
Craig: Because this guy's stronger and faster than me. The only chance I've got is if I fight dirty. And let's face it, your family is legendary for that.
Malcolm: Well, people exaggerate...
Craig: Please, you've got to teach me everything you know.
Reese: I don't think that's such a great idea. I mean, I teach you some tricks, you teach them to someone else, he teaches them to another guy and sooner or later, I'm in a fair fight.