Carla: So, Rob, tell me the truth, you really don't miss having the big bucks?
Robin: Not a bit of it. Money makes people greedy, and greed is a disease. I was a miser. A sick little squirrel hiding money belts filled with millions of dollars all over the world.
Carla: You mean, uh, there were other ones besides that one you hid in the desk in Sam's office?
Robin: I- I used to hide them in pairs, backups, in case someone found the first one. Well, thank God I'm no longer obsessed by money. Now all I need is happiness and companionship.

Robin: Uh, do you mind, darling? I've been walking since Tuesday. Can we go home now?
Rebecca: Yes. You are inspiration. And l, too, feel that money is the root of all evil and that friendship is true gold. That's why I value your friendship so much, Robin. [to the guys] Money! Money! Money! Money! Money!

Carla: So, did anyone else hear Robin say that he hides money belts in pairs?
Norm: Uh, I did.
Cliff: Yeah, but he, uh, only walked out of here with one of them.
Norm: Uh-huh.
Frasier: You don't suppose...
Sam: Oh, come on, give me a break, you guys. I know what you're thinking. There's no way in hell that he put another money belt in this place. It's ridiculous.
Frasier: Yeah.
Norm: Yeah, you're right, Sam, I guess.
Sam: Damn right I am. Okay, closing time! Everybody out!

Sam: Come on, I mean it. We're closed. Get out.
Norm: Sammy, it's only ten after 8:00.
Sam: Yeah, well... [yawns] I'm really tired. Come on, let's go. Everybody out.
Carla: Sam Malone, you know, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. As soon as money enters the picture, you try to kick out all your friends. Now, who was there for you when Diane left you, huh? Who was there for you when this bar burned down? Us, your friends, that's who.
Sam: I'm not kidding, get out.
Frasier: Don't forget, Sam, that's not your money. If one of us finds it and tries to keep it, the others can blow the whistle.
Sam: You guys would really send me to jail?
Carla: In a heartbeat.

Robin: [answers phone] Howe residence. Oh! Uh, hello, Frasier.
Frasier: I was just thinking about how you mentioned that you used to use, uh, hidden money belts, as financial security. Well, it just so happens that I have some valuables that I'd like to hide. But where? So I'd like to pick your brain if I could. Uh, I know that you favored the underside of desk drawers, but, uh, I thought you might throw out some more ideas. Pretend that you're the old Robin. [call waiting beeps]
Robin: Uh, uh, Frasier, would you just hold for a minute? I have another call coming in. Hello?
Cliff: Oh, yeah, hey, Robin, listen, uh yeah, found some sort of a money belt and I assume it's yours here, you know, but I hate to cause any problems in case it's not. So, okay I get it. Why don't you tell me where you hid yours and- and I'll tell you if that's where I found this one.
Robin: Well, uh, Cliff, I must admit that I had a penchant for hiding them in, uh, ductwork. You know, that way they'd be easy to get to and, uh, impervious to damage.
Cliff: Oh, uh, great, great, great. Oh, uh, I guess this isn't yours.
Robin: Okay. [changes line] Uh, Frasier?
Frasier: Oh, Robin. Hi. Yeah. Oh, that's okay. Uh... Mm-hmm. Ductwork, you say. Good-bye. [hangs up] It's in the ducts. We're rich. We're rich.
[back in Rebecca's apartment:]
Rebecca: Who was that?
Robin: Your friends. They're tearing apart your place of work looking for one of my money belts.

Carla: That's it. There's nothing in the ducts. We checked the office, the pool room, the rest-rooms. I don't get it. Unless you two are lying. Huh? Just going along with this duct thing waiting for us to keel over with exhaustion.
Cliff: Oh, yeah? How do we know that you two aren't lying?
Carla: That's it, Clavin, you're history, man.
Cliff: All right. Come on, Tortelli. Take your best shot, huh? I never liked you anyway. I only pretended to because you liked me, obviously.
Carla: Why, I ought to... [growling]
Frasier: No, Carla. Carla, no! No! Stop it. Stop it. Don't you see? Greed's turning us into animals. We've got to behave like civilized human beings. All right. All right. Now I've got some sodium Pentathol in my car. If one of you is lying, we'll know it.

Sam: Captain Dobbins. He was there when I came in in the morning.
Carla: Yeah, well, I think we have our answer. Hmm. [on the phone] Hi. Let me speak to Captain Dobbins. Oh, he retired, did he?
Frasier: Hah!
Carla: Six months ago?! Thank you very much. [hangs up] Apparently the good captain has come into some money.
Norm: That crook stole our dough.
Cliff: Yeah. Gotta get him down here.
Frasier: Yeah. How? We just can't give him a call and ask him to drop on by.
Sam: Yeah. Yeah, what are we gonna do?
Carla: Leave this to me, Sam.
Sam: Oh.
Carla: I happen to know some people who can handle this kind of thing, no questions asked. Might cost us a little, but they do good work. [on the phone] Hi. It's Mommy. Wake up your brothers.

Rebecca: You're not kidding, are you?
Robin: No, I'm not kidding. If my prediction is correct, you'll find that your affection for me has suddenly disappeared.
Rebecca: Oh, no. No, it has not. I still care a great... [sighs] Who am I kidding? Oh, God. I haven't changed one bit in two years.
Robin: Yeah, well, I can't say I'm not disappointed.
Rebecca: Robin, I'm so sorry. Please...
Robin: Good-bye. Good-bye, Rebecca. [exits]
Rebecca: Good-bye, Robin.

Carla: Thanks, kids! Now wipe down the car, ditch it and get right to bed! It's a school night!
Fire Marshal Dobbins: Oh, Sam. Thank God! Do you know this person?
Carla: Shut up, moneybags. Sammy, guess who's living in a brand-new house.
Norm: Oh, a new house and retirement. You've got a lot of explaining to do, buster.
Fire Marshal Dobbins: What are you talking about?
Carla: Maybe you would like to tell us how you got rich six months ago.
Norm: Mm-hmm.
Fire Marshal Dobbins: My grandmother passed away. Do you mind?
Sam: We happen to know there was a money belt hidden in one of those air ducts in that wall that burned down, and that money disappeared right around the same time your grandma so conveniently checked out. Mm-hmm.So, what have you got to say there Mr. Trump? Hmm?
Fire Marshal Dobbins: This is ridiculous. I don't know anything about a money belt. I have half a mind to call the police on all of you.
All: Oh.
Norm: I'm terrified.
Carla: Aw, Captain, Captain. You know, I think we can straighten this all out. Why don't you and me just take a little walk into the office?

Sam: Okay, then here's the deal. This is my bar. Whoever finds it, I get half. Huh? What do you say? Huh?
Cliff: All right.
Frasier: All right, sounds reasonable. And then the other half will be divided among ourselves. I suggest that we split into teams to expedite the search.
Sam: Sounds good to me.
Cliff: Of course it sounds good to him, he gets half.
Carla: What do you think you're doing, Sam?
Sam: I'm gonna read my paper until one of you brings me my half.