Lindsay: Well, I'm sorry, Michael, but Tobias moving out hasn't been easy.
Michael: For any of us.
Lindsay: You didn't even notice he'd gone, did you?
Michael: I did notice we'd stopped TiVoing The Christopher Lowell Show.

Gob: Tobias moved out? Did he take the good video camera with him?
Michael: That's really very touching, Gob. What do you need the camera for?
Gob: I'm making a magic video. I'm gonna tape myself doing tricks around the office. I'm calling it Tricks - let me finish - around the Office. I figured out a way to make money while I'm working.
Michael: But that is what we call working. Something you might wanna try next time you're at the office.

Gob: I'll vote as long as you give me the camera. I think we all know that George Michael was using it last.
Narrator: A fact the family had discovered when they'd gathered to watch a home video.
George Sr.: Was that a 40th anniversary party, huh? Didn't cost us a thing.
Michael: Is that Qusay Hussein at the omelet bar?
George Sr.: [on tape] Look at this. If these guys move, they don't get paid.
Narrator: It seems that as a 13-year-old, George Michael had been heavily influenced by the Star Wars films and had endeavored to re-create his favorite moments.
George Michael: [on tape] You're not my father! You'll never be!
George Sr.: I spent $2.1 million of good company money and end up with this?
George Michael: [on tape] You cut off my hand!

Gob: Even you have to admit that that was the lamest thing ever put on tape.
Narrator: Not so. Buster had once videotaped himself re-creating moments from his then favorite film, Chicago. He also liked Star Wars.

Ann: [o.s.] I want you to do it.
George Michael: [o.s.] I don't think I'm ready.
Ann: [o.s.] Of course you are.
George Michael: [o.s.] I'm gonna lose it before I start.
Michael: [enters] Don't start! Smoking. It's a killer. That Sammy Davis Jr. should still be performing.

Michael: But everyone loves you. You are George Michael! Who's cooler than you? Plus, you would be following in your old man's footsteps.
Ann: You were student body president?
Michael: Oh-ho. It was close.
Ann: So you lost.
Michael: Who remembers?
Ann: I know I would remember.
George Michael: Ann, if my dad says that he won, then he won.
Michael: Didn't say I won. Said I can't remember. But now that we're thinking about it, I seem to remember the other guy won the title, although there were plenty in the school who wanted to overturn the decision. I said, "Let's- Do not- Let's not put the school through that." Haven't thought about that for years. Good memory.

Ann: Well, anyway, I'll help you run your campaign and make your commercial for election day.
Michael: Well, that's great. The important thing is to raise the old self-esteem and not to rush a physical relationship. Those are really the two important things.
Ann: No. We're both waiting.
Michael: Good.
Ann: And then that first time, after waiting and waiting... It's gonna be so awesome, because it's not just gonna be my love and George Michael's but God's love as well. God, it's gonna be incredible.
George Michael: All right. I'll do it. I'm in.
Michael: Campaign?
George Michael: I'm pumped.

Maeby: What was that all about?
Michael: Your uncle doesn't not-work here anymore.

Maeby: I mean, I don't even know why I'm doing it. He's gonna win by a landslide.
Michael: That's what I was tellin' him.
Maeby: How do you know Steve Holt? Are you in A.A.?
Michael: I was talkin' about George Michael. He's running for student body president. Who's Steve Holt?
Maeby: He's just the hottest guy in school. And he's won three years in a row. Every year after his first junior year.
Michael: So, then, he's more popular than George Michael?
Maeby: Well, that's like comparing apples and some fruit nobody's ever heard of. He might even finish after the Indian kid.
Michael: I guess I gotta get down to the school and see if I can stop him from signing up, huh?
Maeby: Yes. You have to. And do you think you could put up a couple of these when you're there, 'cause I was really not in the mood to go down there.

Lindsay: [answers phone] Hello?
Tobias: [on the phone] Hey. I can't talk loudly. I'm in the bathroom of the Wrench set, and they've started shooting. Also, I don't think this is a real toilet. So I just wanted to check on Maeby and tell you that I haven't landed a part yet but despite what you may think, my talent shall win out.
Lindsay: Well, Maeby's fine. We've been looking for a cleaning lady, so if you hear of one-
Tobias: Shh- Shh.
Man: [o.s.] dirty cop, so Frank Wrench is gonna clean ya. Why is this door locked?
Director: [o.s.] Cut!
Man: [o.s.] Is somebody using the set bathroom?