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‘Halloween IV’ Quotes

Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Halloween IV

405. Halloween IV

Aired October 18, 2016

It's Halloween in the Nine-Nine, which can only mean one thing: heist time. This year, the squad members pull out all the stops in their quest to win the new defending title of "Ultimate Detective Slash Genius". Lines are drawn and plans are made, but there can only be one reigning champion.

Quote from Scully

Amy: Attention, squad.
Gina: Mm, pretty dainty way to make an announcement.
Amy: It's a workplace. I wanted to be respectful.
Scully: Well, as someone at a high risk for a spook-related death, thank you.

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Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Over the past month, I've had him trained to retrieve plaques. And now, boy, it's time to make Daddy proud.
Charles: Yes, sir.
Captain Holt: I could not have been more clearly talking to the dog.

Quote from Hitchcock

Hitchcock: Attention, everyone.
Rosa: Enough. We know. The heist is happening.
Hitchcock: No, my ex-wife just died. No more alimony, baby!

Quote from Hitchcock

Scully: So what are you planning for the heist?
Sergeant Jeffords: The only thing I'm planning is getting my work done.
Hitchcock: Sure, you are. Come clean, or we'll tell everybody about your mistress.
Sergeant Jeffords: I don't have a mistress.
Hitchcock: You don't? But you're so good-looking. What's the point?

Quote from Gina

Gina: Bill, but you got to stand like me. I'm kind of like a young Brando, so give it that energy. Okay, yeah. You're doing the best you can with the tools that you have.

Quote from Charles

Charles: This is so frustrating. There's no way of knowing who has the plaque.
Captain Holt: Amy and Rosa have it.
Charles: What? How do you know?
Captain Holt: Diaz usually favors her left leg, but after "zero dark pizza," she was suddenly favoring her right.
Charles: Yes, yes, which means that she was...
Captain Holt: You trailed off and didn't finish speaking. Continue.
Charles: I don't want to.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Bing-pot!

Quote from Charles

Captain Holt: And now it's time to send in our cute little secret weapon.
Charles: I'm ready, Captain. I love the nickname.
Captain Holt: No, Charles, not you. I was talking about Cheddar.
Charles: Oh, right, obviously.

Quote from Jake

Rosa: Wait, what is going on? We have the plaque.
Amy: Yeah, I just got it out of the vent to rub it in your faces.
Jake: "I Just Got It Out of the Vent to Rub It in Your Faces" Name of your sex tape. What?

Quote from Charles

Rosa: Black lights. What the hell?
Amy: Oh, my God. Our precinct is disgusting.
Charles: Dear God. Hitchcock and Scully's desk!

Quote from Scully

Sergeant Jeffords: Look, I wasn't hiding. I was doing my work. Hitchcock and Scully were with me.
Jake: Were they, or perhaps were they distracted by your brilliant pizza ruse?
Scully: Totally distracted. I ate two whole pies. Folded 'em up like tacos.

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: The plaque will be held in this.
Amy: Is that my childhood caboodle?
Jake: It most certainly is, but don't worry. I removed the scrunchies, old report cards, and photos of young Al Gore. I'm better-looking than him anyway.
Captain Holt: We're talking a young Al Gore? [Holt and Amy laugh] Peralta, you do make me laugh.
Jake: Okay, stings a little bit.

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: Now, then, locking the caboodle.
Captain Holt: The "ca-boo-dale" will be placed in the center of the bullpen.
Jake: Right, and what is the name of the store at the mall that sells the sticky pastries?
Captain Holt: You mean the "See-nay-bone"?
Jake: Yeah, that was it. Thanks. Continue.

Quote from Gina

Jake: I totally planned everything for Charles.This is a nightmare!
Gina: Ew! What can Charles Boyle do that I can't?
Jake: Roller-skate like an angel.
Gina: Whore, I'm great on skates. Or are you forgetting Jenn Sutton's fourth grade birthday party?
Jake: I have definitely forgotten that.
Gina: Well, I skated like a pro, and then I spent seven minutes in heaven with the Todd Cohen. It was dope.

Quote from Gina

Gina: My point is, I can do anything Charles can.
Jake: Except look exactly like the body double I got for him. Bill, you can come out now.
Bill: Hi.
Gina: Okay, yeah, this pasty white guy is gonna be a problem.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Who hired you? Who do you work for, pizza man?

Quote from Captain Holt

Jake: [gasps] The caboodle!
Amy: The caboodle!
Captain Holt: The "ca-boo-dale"!

Quote from Jake

Jake: Gina! Of course! It all makes sense, except for the parts I don't understand and the fact that I still kind of think Terry did this.

Quote from Gina

Gina: I came back, wearing the perfect disguise to make sure I was never noticed by anyone. Something so drab and uninspiring-
Amy: This feels like it's gonna be a dig on me.
Gina: I wore Amy's clothes.
Amy: There it is.

Quote from Gina

All: Gina Linetti is the ultimate human/genius.
Gina: Thank you. And now I'd like to say a few words.
Rosa: You talked for, like, an hour when you had us locked in that interrogation room.
Gina: I'm a fair ruler. Your comment has been heard. But seriously, you guys, I just want to say, I freaking love you losers. Happy Halloween.


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