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‘Jiu-jitsu, Bubble Wrap, and Yoo-hoo’ Quotes

Young Sheldon: Jiu-jitsu, Bubble Wrap, and Yoo-hoo

117. Jiu-jitsu, Bubble Wrap, and Yoo-hoo

Aired April 5, 2018

After Sheldon starts learning self-defense, Mary and George are disturbed to find out he is being bullied. When the identity of his unlikely tormenter is revealed, Sheldon's parents disagree on how to handle the situation.

Quote from Sheldon

Mary: Aw, baby. I'm so sorry you're havin' to deal with this.
Sheldon: It's okay. German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said, "That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
Mary: And do you feel stronger?
Sheldon: [contemplating] No.

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Quote from Meemaw

George Sr.: The little Sparks girl?
Mary: You're kidding. She seems so sweet.
George Jr.: He says she slaps him around, takes his lunch money. She even put a tadpole down his shirt.
Meemaw: Poor kid. He tucks in those shirts.

Quote from Meemaw

Mary: She looks harmless.
Meemaw: She's cute. So she probably gets away with stuff. I'm like that.

Quote from Adult Sheldon

Adult Sheldon: The perilous journey from the bus stop to my front door was 97.5 meters. FYI, insisting on using the metric system in East Texas is another reason I was hunted by predators.

Quote from George Sr.

Meemaw: I bowled a new high score last night.
George Sr.: Nice.
Meemaw: I got two turkeys.
Missy: What's a turkey?
Meemaw: It's three strikes in a row.
Missy: Why do they call it a turkey?
Meemaw: Well, when they first invented bowling, they used to just throw frozen turkeys at the pins. Eventually, they switched to balls to cut down on the smell.
George Sr.: Why you lying to her?
Meemaw: I find it keeps my mind sharp.

Quote from George Jr.

Mary: Georgie, I need to talk to you, and wake up, you're gonna be late.
George Jr.: Got it covered. I sleep in my clothes.

Quote from George Jr.

Mary: Look, somebody has been picking on your brother. You know anything about it?
George Jr.: No.
Mary: You better not be covering for anybody.
George Jr.: I'm not. Most kids at school ignore him, and the girls all think he's cute. It's kind of annoying.

Quote from George Jr.

Mary: Well, I need you to look after him.
George Jr.: Why?
Mary: Because I'm your mother, and I'm asking you nicely.
George Jr.: What if I don't want to?
Mary: I don't care, you're doing it.
George Jr.: How was that nice?

Quote from George Sr.

Herschel Sparks: I don't know what to tell you, George. I mean, is it, is it possible your son has a little crush on her?
George Sr.: Oh, I don't think he's wired that way.
Herschel Sparks: Oh, are you saying that he's a-
George Sr.: No, no, I'm saying he's a bookworm. Unless she's math or a dictionary, he ain't interested.

Quote from Mary

Sheldon: Did you ever have a bully when you were growing up?
Mary: Have you met your grandma?

Quote from Mary

Brenda Sparks: You know what? I have been nothin' but nice to you and your family since the day y'all moved in, and I'm over it. Watching you walk around all holier than thou, like you're better than everyone else. Well, guess what, you're not.
Mary: I'm gonna pray for you!

Quote from Adult Sheldon

Adult Sheldon: Existing in a world of predators isn't easy, but we prey have developed several natural defenses to help us survive. There's playing dead, warning calls, camouflage, and, last but certainly not least, good old-fashioned running away. A little screaming never hurts either.


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