Dean Quote #84
Pearl: I mean, some of us have TVs, but not ones we can watch all the time.
Dean: We have four.
Buster: Whoa! There's only one place I know with that many.
[cut to Dean, Buster and Pearl standing in front of an electronics store:]
Dean: That's the episode where Mrs. Kravitz thinks Darrin and Samantha have a baby. My neighbor in Montgomery, Ms. Stringer, is nosy just like that. Ooh! And that's the one where Gomer and Sergeant Carter lose the Colonel's dog. I'm not saying they stole the idea, but same thing happened to me and my friend Cory. Oh, and that? That's The Mod Squad, where they catch car thieves. Just like the crime in Montgomery.
Quote from Adult Dean
Adult Dean: In Alabama, what most people called "spring break" was called A.E.A. It had something to do with a week-long teachers conference, blah, blah, blah, blah. All we cared about was no school. Lots of my friends went on trips with their families to the mountains or the beach, but I was gonna spend my vacation in my happy place... On the couch, in front of the TV. I planned to eat cereal till my teeth fell out and watch cartoons till my eyeballs fell out. Basically, if something didn't fall out, I failed. [music stops]
Lillian: Get dressed, Dean.
Bill: And pack your suitcase.
Dean: W-What? It's my vacation. I've been looking forward to it for weeks.
Lillian: Change of plans. We're going to visit Grandpa and Grandma's farm.
Dean: We're going to the country?! Why?!
Adult Dean: Contrary to popular belief, there's a difference between growing up in "the South" and growing up in "the Country." I did the former. My mom and dad did the latter. This is how I grew up. [toilet flushes] And this was them. [picture of an outhouse] My groceries. [pack of chicken] Their groceries. [girl surrounded by chickens] My chores. [vacuum cleaner] Their chores. [Black people picking cotton] Okay, that last one may have been over a hundred years ago, but that's how old they seemed to me. My point... We were not the same.
Quote from Adult Dean
Big Jim: Mm, mm. Transmission fluid tastes burnt. Could be a crack in the fluid line.
Bill: Don't worry. It won't hurt him. But too much of this will definitely make you go blind. [both laugh]
Adult Dean: Years later, when I took a sip from Grandpa's flask, I got the joke. Then I threw up and passed out.
Quote from The Sleepover
Adult Dean: The fact that Coach Long was trusting me with a secret he couldn't tell Cory made me feel mature, special.
It almost made me forget that I am terrible at keeping secrets.
Kim: Why'd you buy paper plates?
Dean: For your surprise birthday party.
Bill: Thanks, Dean.
Bill: I can't wait to see Planet of the Apes.
Dean: Yeah, I heard it was good. They were on Earth all along. [off Bill's look] W-What? I said it was good.
Quote from Independence Day
Bill: I told you how he was swerving all over the road.
Dean: It was like watching a drunk turtle.
Lillian: Well, it was worse than that. He had a fender-bender. Left the car and walked home. They called a tow truck, but he couldn't remember where he left it.
Bill: [sighs] I guess it's time.
Lillian: Yeah. Everybody's time comes sooner or later. I know it's hard, but you're doing the right thing, and you're doing it because you love him.
Dean: It's okay, Dad. He'll be in a better place, like Buster.
Adult Dean: I didn't exactly know what they were talking about, but it sounded like when my dog Buster had to go to a big farm in the sky.
Bill: What? Boy, we're talking about stopping your granddad from driving, not putting him down.