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Lads and Ladies and Us

‘Lads and Ladies and Us’

Season 1, Episode 10 -  Aired January 5, 2022

Bill and Lillian try to join a high society club, hoping it will set a good influence for Kim and Dean.

Quote from Lillian

Lillian: Did you hear what she said about "good hair"? Like anybody's hair could stay good out in this type of humidity for hours.
Vivian: I did. It was right after she said, "We only take a certain type of family into Lads and Ladies." I see a whole lot of milk chocolate out here and not a lot of dark chocolate.
Lillian: Mm-hmm.

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Quote from Cory

Cory: Hey, I'm not gonna lie. I felt a little left out last time, so I spent all night studying up on the planets. Did you know that Pluto is so far out there that from there, the sun just looks like a regular star? Also, did you know that we have a library by where we live?
Adult Dean: Wait a minute, Cory's an astronomer all of a sudden?
Dean: Hey, you know how sports is your thing?
Cory: Mm-hmm.
Dean: Maybe leave the planets to me.
Cory: Okay. Unless there's a cute girl out there. Then the Pluto thing's coming back out.
Adult Dean: Cory was probably the only kid in the world who could make a pick-up line about Pluto work.

Quote from Adult Dean

Adult Dean: One of the great things about my mom was how much she invested in us when we were little. She was like that for all of us. But she and Kim had things in common that she didn't have with me and my brother Bruce. A few years later, Bruce and I destroyed that tea set wrestling around in the family room. Kim adored mama. She wanted to be just like her. And mama loved the special bond they shared. Then the teen years hit.
Kim: You think I'm gonna wear this? Am I moving to a convent?
Lillian: No.
Adult Dean: It started out as fights about clothes. Then makeup, then curfew. Pretty soon it felt like they were fighting about everything. My dad understood this was a typical pattern for girls and their moms. Unfortunately, I didn't.
Dean: This is so crazy. They argue so much 'cause they're just alike.
[Lillian and Kim stop arguing and glare at Dean]
Bill: [sighs]
[fantasy: Bill escapes from kitchen on a jet pack]
Adult Dean: Like my dad, I eventually learned to stay out of it. That's just the way things were.

Quote from Lillian

Kim: So what? I missed one meeting. I was tired. Stop making a big deal about this.
Lillian: It is a big deal. You can't just miss a meeting with a college recruiter because you felt tired. When I was applying, I met with every recruiter I could, whether I felt like it or not.
Kim: I know. And your applications were perfect, and your interviews were perfect, and your GPA...
Lillian: Was not perfect. I made a "B." Once.
Kim: I've told you a million times, I'm not sure I even want to go to college.
Lillian: Bill, you'd better get your daughter.
Adult Dean: Kim and I both knew that if mom referred to us as our father's children, we needed to be out of range of anything she could throw.
Kim: College is my decision, not yours. [slams door]
[cut to Kim and Dean staring at Kim's now-detached door]
Lillian: Go ahead. Slam another door.

Quote from Bill

Bill: Dean! Come get a couple cokes for me and Mr. Long.
Adult Dean: In the South, everything was called a "coke," but I knew what my dad actually wanted was a ginger ale. And Cory knew his dad was asking for a grape soda.
Dean: But, dad, you're closer to the fridge than we are.
Bill: Boy, go get us some cokes and don't talk back. [Coach Long stares at Cory]
Cory: What? I didn't even say nothing.
Bill: Can you believe that? When I was coming up, you'd never question an adult.
Coach Long: And if you did, you'd wake up in the middle of next week.

Quote from Coach Long

Vivian: I hear you. That's why we're thinking about putting our Cory into Lads and Ladies.
Coach Long: Yeah, we want to get him around some children with some good families that share the same values that we do.
Lillian: We talked about joining when they were starting that local chapter a few years back. Remember, Bill?
Bill: Yeah, but I'm not sure we're Lads and Ladies-type people. We do all right, but we're not fancy like they are.
Coach Long: You mean like us? Now, we can get up and get into our brand-new Cadillac out front and leave.
Bill: Don't get your 'fro all bent out of shape, Mr. Rockefeller. You're not going anywhere with us sitting on ten books over here.
Coach Long: Yeah, you right about that. [laughter]

Quote from Dean

Adult Dean: Thankfully, I saw Cory. I'd just do whatever he did, like I do in school when I didn't fit in. And on the baseball team. And in church... [chuckling] Man, pretty soon, I'm gonna have to pay Cory a retainer.
Cory: I am so happy to see you, man. I don't know what to say to these cats. They're... They're different.
Nelson: Uh, no. They're gonna have to scrap the Apollo 7 with all the problems with the Apollo 6.
Sophia: That's not what Time magazine said, Nelson.
Adult Dean: A bunch of black kids talking about space missions? This felt unfamiliar yet familiar. Could I be... In my element?
Cory: You know, my man Dean knows everything about science. Tell them about your new chemistry set.
Dean: Yeah, well, I did get the new Skilcraft Chem Master set for my birthday.
Nelson: What? I thought that was for kids 16 and over.
Sophia: The government makes them put it on the box.
Dean: Yeah, it does have some serious chemicals. But, uh, I can make a stink bomb.
Sophia: Stink bombs are so cool. How do you make one? [Dean huddles with the group]
Adult Dean: I found my tribe! I had a feeling I'd never had before... confidence!
Dean: And so I said, "then, do you pee outside?" [laughter]
Cory: You were right, Dean. It was a thinker.

Quote from Cory

Nelson: Hey, Dean, are you coming to the planetarium with us next week?
Dean: Uh, I hope so. I mean, I love the planetarium.
Cory: Dean can name all eight planets.
Adult Dean: Cory was wrong then, but he turned out to be right thanks to an absolutely fascinating string of discoveries. Yeah, still a nerd.

Quote from Bill

Bill: Nobody else is gonna talk about how Kim's dress is cut too low? I can see the girl's heart beat.
Kim: Daddy! Ugh!
Bill: You better be walking off to get another dress.

Quote from Coach Long

Lillian: Well, he's not half as bad as Kim. Jesus, keep me near the cross.
Vivian: Ooh, yeah. I heard about your little door-slamming fix.
Coach Long: Yeah, we're, uh, remodeling our sun porch, so if you want to come rip some more doors off, come right on over. [laughter]

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