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‘Whistleblower’ Quotes   Page 2 of 5    

The Office: Whistleblower

626. Whistleblower

Aired May 20, 2010

Jo is determined to identify the whisteblower who told the press about the faulty Sabre printers, leaving Michael wondering how to protect his employees.

Quote from Michael Scott

Jo: Honey, you don't seem like your normal self.
Michael Scott: Well, I'm going through a little bit of a rough patch.
Jo: Mama Jo knew there was something up.
Michael Scott: Whole year, actually. My favorite restaurant closed down.
Jo: Oh, I hate that.
Michael Scott: And my new favorite restaurant sucks. I bought a video camera last year, and I was looking at the tapes, and there were only like twelve minutes that I felt was worth taping the whole year. And most of that was just birds in my condo complex. What is that? ... I miss Holly.
Jo: Who's Holly?
Michael Scott: Holly Flax from the Nashua branch. Best HR rep that Dunder Mifflin has ever seen. It's not been a blockbuster year for me financially. My Blockbuster stock is down.

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Quote from Creed

Andy: Gabe, I told you all about the printers.
Jim: I mean, it could be you, Gabe. I mean, that's the point.
Pam: Yes, it's totally obvious.
Creed: I think we all can agree that it's either Gabe or Angela. [flips a coin] It's Angela. Get her, boys.

Quote from Michael Scott

Michael Scott: Apparently, there are allegations that Sabre printers can cause a fire. So they asked me to give a statement to the press. I'm like, what? All right. So I do it. It's on TV last night. And it's in the paper today. And it's online. And then I call Froggy 98.7, the request line. I talk to the host about it on the air. It's like, come on, people, enough.

Quote from Michael Scott

Michael Scott: Everybody, we are at DEFCON 5. I am officially the second-most watched clip of the day on the WBRE news site.
Oscar: What's number one?
Michael Scott: Oh, that teacher who was wrongfully accused of being a pedophile. Now, we cannot let the pedophile win again! I would like you all to go to the website and watch my clip eleven times.
Jim: So instead of working, you want...
Michael Scott: Yes.

Quote from Michael Scott

Jo: It's a little form, says "I did not do it."
Michael Scott: There is no reason for anyone here to sign this, because I know everything there is to know about these people. I know when their birthdays are, I know what their favorite kind of cake is, I know what color streamers they like...
Jo: All that's just birthday information, Michael.
Michael Scott: Yes, yes, but it shows a bigger picture.

Quote from Michael Scott

Jo: So say we catch this whistleblower, what do you think I should do with him?
Michael Scott: We should give him a one-way ticket to Montego Bay, where they keep all the al-Qaeda.
Jo: Uh, that's, uh, Guantanamo Bay.
Michael Scott: Yes. You put them in jail for a long time, you put them in jail for as long as you can.
Jo: Well, I guess we're all right, Michael.
Michael Scott: I want these people to really pay, I want them to suffer. I'd prefer it if they died, 'cause it's not right.

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute

Nick: Hey, Dwight.
Dwight K. Schrute: Hey, IT guy.
Nick: Mind if I get in there for a second?
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, sure thing, go ahead.
Nick: Just one... [Dwight pushes Nick's head down onto the desk and holds his arm up behind him] Gah! Ah! Dwight, what the hell?
Dwight K. Schrute: Apache persuasion hold, that's the hell! What are you doing to my computer?
Oscar: The lawyers are searching our hard drives for information on the leak. Thanks a lot, Big Brother.
Dwight K. Schrute: You're with Big Brother? Okay, go ahead. I got nothing to hide.

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute

Jo: Okay, Dwight.
Dwight K. Schrute: Hold that thought. I don't want to waste your time, and I wouldn't dare waste mine. I didn't do it. Now, I don't know exactly who did it, but I have a list right here... You should fire the following people.
Jo: Well, I'm inclined to believe you.
Dwight K. Schrute: Why would I disparage a company that has made me rich beyond my wildest dreams?
Jo: Yeah, I noticed you've had a great year. Good boy. You turning that money into more money?
Dwight K. Schrute: Are you referring to alchemy?
Jo: I don't like to tell a man what to do with his money, but if you ain't investing in property, then you're dumber than a dummy.
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm not dumb. I'm smart.
Jo: Well, buy property. That's my advice.

Quote from Toby

Jo: Sounds like you were as blindsided by this as I was.
Toby: Well, that's...
Jo: And we didn't find anything on your computer.
Toby: Good.
Jo: Except this. [hands stack of paper to Toby]
Toby: Oh, wow, this is, uh, just a mystery novel that I've been working on.
Jo: I know what it is. I skimmed the first chapter. I'm just curious, why would a man who hates people want to have a relationship with a maid?
Toby: Oh, uh, I don't know. Uh...
Jo: The way I look at it, there's only one of two reasons. He knows a secret about her that she doesn't know herself, or he wants to use her services to mop up after a murder.
Toby: Oh... yes.
[aside to camera:]
Toby: Write your own damn novel.

Quote from Michael Scott

Michael Scott: You leaked it?
Pam: I don't know what to do! Do I go tell Jo, or- I don't want everyone to keep blaming the wrong person!
Michael Scott: I don't know what the best plan is, Pam. Oh, God, my mind is going a mile an hour.
Pam: That fast?

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