Michael Scott: Oh, boy. That was yummy. Thank you so much. You know what? I think I left my wallet in my car. Do you mind if I run out and get it?
Waiter: No problem.
Michael Scott: Okay. I'll be right back. [goes to leave but walks back]. Okay. You know what? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't have my wallet and I was gonna try to dine and dash and that was stupid and I realize I can't do that to you fine people.
Waiter: So you can't pay for your food?
Michael Scott: Well, I can, but I will have to come back later tonight and pay you. But the point is I did the right thing.
Waiter: You did not. You have no money, but you dined. And you dined so much.
Michael Scott: Well, the number three is not such a giant feast.
Waiter: Mr. Chu!
Michael Scott: Okay, all right. You know what?
Waiter: You were trying to steal food from us?
Michael Scott: I am not. I just have had a bad day. And I... okay. I'll be back later with the money. I'm just gonna leave right now.
Waiter: You can't. We'll stop you.
Michael Scott: Well, I think I can get through the door.
[The heavy-set restaurant proprietor, Mr. Chu, appears behind Michael]

Erin: Where did he go, Holly?
Holly: I have no idea.
Dwight K. Schrute: Do you see a little clown that you want to follow, huh? Is there a little bird that's chirping to you, "this way, this way"?
Holly: I don't know.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay, close your eyes, we need you to think. What is Michael seeing right now? Can you tell him that we miss him? Michael we're coming for you!
Holly: Will you stop! There has been a few coincidences, that's all.

Holly: Look, I'm not playing. I'm gonna go look for him.
Erin: Good. We don't need her.
Dwight K. Schrute: Right. I can do this on my own. I can think like Michael. All right... I'm deep below the ocean's surface in a submarine. A torpedo's coming right at me. No. Damn it, that's just my own imagination. Maybe he's bowling.

Holly: [climbs the stairs to the roof of a building and finds Michael] Michael?
Michael Scott: Hi. [laughs] How did you know I was up here?
Holly: What are you doing up here?
Michael Scott: I got turned around. I thought I could see Dunder Mifflin.
Holly: Dunder Mifflin.
Michael Scott: Yeah. [laughs] Wow. I just miss you so much.
Holly: I missed you too.
Michael Scott: Really?
Holly: Yeah.
Michael Scott: Can I kiss you?
Holly: Yeah.
Michael Scott: Okay.

Andy: Oh, it is on like Genghis Khan wearing Sean John in Bhutan.

Pam: Where?
Jim: Okay, fine, three hints. One, when you are getting colder, you're really getting warmer.
Pam: The fridge.
Jim: Two, you have a better chance, if you think Bob Vance.
Pam: The fridge, got it.
Jim: And the final clue...
Michael Scott: Let's go!
Jim: You know what, just think about it, you'll be fine.
Pam: Bye.

Kevin: Okay, it's two giant dogs with two giant palm trees on a regular size island.
Oscar: Okay, I got one.
Pam: Yeah?
Oscar: Yes!
Gabe: Okay, I'm sorry but I am going to have to shut this down.
All: Boo!
Meredith: Why?
Gabe: Unless we can all agree to some ground rules. It's either that or I can fax this to Jo and let her decide how to proceed.

Phyllis: Maybe that's not the best one. Keep reading.
Gabe: Uh, it was.
Meredith: Maybe it wasn't.
Gabe: "Oh, thank God. I had a horrible nightmare that I was stuck in America with Gabe."
Andy: Oh! [laughter]
Phyllis: No, that's not the one I was thinking of. Keep going.
Gabe: "I know what it smells like but I didn't roll in anything. It's from listening to all of Gabe's bull[bleep]." [laughter] "Isn't this the perfect romantic getaway, Erin? Sitting on a deserted island wearing dog costumes? I'm Gabe and I'm a weirdo."
Andy: [laughs]
Gabe: "Gabe's mom... Hmm... Gabe's mom? Wait. Tall woman? Looks like Gabe? Yeah, I banged her."
Phyllis: Yeah, there you go. [laughter]

Kelly: Everybody, can I please have your attention? Ryan and I have a huge announcement.
Erin: Oh my gosh!
Phyllis: Wow.
Kelly: Over the weekend, Ryan Bailey Howard and I got divorced. [throws ring on the ground]
Meredith: Sweet! Free Ring!
Andy: Divorced?
Ryan: Just so you know, it's totally amicable. We're fine. We don't need people here to take sides.
Kelly: The last thing that we want is any kind of drama.
Pam: Wait. Can you back up? What's the story?
Kelly: We were having a beautiful weekend in the Poconos. We were making love, constantly. We saw the sunrise. Ryan was crying a lot.
Ryan: That's not a relevant detail.
Kelly: And in the morning we walked by a chapel and we stopped, suddenly, and Ryan said...
Ryan and Kelly: I don't think I should be married to you anymore.

Kevin: What?
Andy: Sorry, when did you get married?
Kelly: Umm, like a week ago, we got really wasted and it just felt right.
Andy: And you didn't invite any of us?
Ryan: We are getting divorced, Andy! This is such a raw time.
Kelly: God baby, you know, people's reactions to this, I wonder if we made a mistake.
Ryan: No, with the messed up laws in this country, I don't want to be married until everyone can be married.
Oscar: You know what, Ryan, I talked to the other gay guys, and we're okay with it. We all agreed it's fine if you got married.
Ryan: No, Oscar. Not- Not until everyone can!
Kelly: Ryan, I changed my mind.
Ryan: Okay, fine, you know what, this actually isn't amicable at all and we actually do need people to take sides. Who is on my side? [no hands go up]
Kelly: And who is on my side? [again, no hands]