Michael Scott: Okay. Let's do another one. This is a good one. A particular concern for office workers is a sedimentary lifestyle which can contribute-
Toby: Sedentary.
Michael Scott: Yes. Which can contribute to heart disease. Heart disease kills more people than balers.
Lonny: That's called having a fat butt, Michael.
Michael Scott: No. No, it's sedentary.
Lonny: Yeah, that's fat butt disease. That's what you suffer from? You have fat butt disease, Michael?
Kelly: Excuse me, sea monster, you weigh like a thousand pounds.

Darryl: That's what we've been trying to tell you, Mike. It's serious down there. We do dangerous stuff, man. This is shenanigans, foolishness. Nerf ball. You live a sweet little nerfy life sitting on your biscuit never having to risk it.

Michael Scott: Pam, depression is as scary as a baler, right?
Pam: I don't understand the question.
Michael Scott: Working in an office can lead to depression, which can lead to suicide. I mean this is really serious stuff.
Pam: Yeah.
Michael Scott: Nobody commits suicide because they work with a baler. And yet those guys are making fun of me, calling me a Nerf. That-
Pam: It's really hard to demonstrate depression. Their safety training had visuals.
Michael Scott: Yeah. You are so right. They have visual aids and all we had were the facts. You don't go to the science museum and get handed a pamphlet on electricity. You go to the science museum and you put your hand on a metal ball and your hair sticks up straight. And you know science.
Pam: So, you're okay?
Michael Scott: Indubitably.

Michael Scott: They used props, they used visual aids and they just made us look like dopes.
Dwight K. Schrute: Idiots! God, what are we going to do?
Michael Scott: I don't know. I don't know. Because you know what our killer is? Depression.
Dwight K. Schrute: Wolves.
Michael Scott: Depression.
Dwight K. Schrute: Visual aids.
Michael Scott: Yes.
Dwight K. Schrute: A quilt. A depression quilt.
Michael Scott: No time to sew a quilt.

Dwight K. Schrute: Ready?
Michael Scott: Let's do it. Drop that sucker.
Dwight K. Schrute: Yeah!
Michael Scott: Bingo!
[The watermelon bounces off the trampoline and lands on a car roof. The alarm starts blaring.]
Michael Scott: Deactivate the car alarm, clean up the mess.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay.
Michael Scott: Find out whose car that is. If it's Stanley's, call the offices of James P. Albini, see if he handles hate crimes.
Dwight K. Schrute: Got it.
Michael Scott: Also, take apart the trampoline. Stick it in the baler.
Dwight K. Schrute: We're not allowed to use the baler.
Michael Scott: Have Padge do it or the sea monster.
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm on it.

Dwight K. Schrute: I'm temporarily lifting the shun.
Andy: Thank you.
Dwight K. Schrute: It means nothing. I need you to do something for me.
Andy: Anything.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay, calm down. I need you to acquire an inflatable house and/or castle.
Andy: You mean a Moonbounce.
Dwight K. Schrute: What do you think? You've got an hour.
Andy: I'm going to need petty cash.
Dwight K. Schrute: Shunning resumed.
Andy: Do you want a drawbridge?
Dwight K. Schrute: Un-shun. Yeah, that sounds good. Re-shun.

Dwight K. Schrute: When you land, try and land like an eight-year-old. These bouncy castles are not designed for adults.

Michael Scott: An office is as safe as the people in it. And sometimes those people can drive you to do crazy things to show the dangers of the office. That's the danger I found myself in today. I saved a life. My own. Am I a hero? I really can't say, but yes.

Darryl: [through megaphone] Mike, this is the opposite of safety. You jump, you're going to seriously hurt yourself.
Michael Scott: You told me that I lead a- A cushy, wimpy Nerf life.
Darryl: Yeah. But I never said you had nothing to live for.
Michael Scott: What do I have to live for?
Darryl: A lot of things. [looking for back-up] You- What about Jan? Lovely, lovely, lovely Jan, man. It's going good, right?
Michael Scott: It's complicated with Jan. And I don't know where I stand or what I want. The sex isn't nearly as good as it used to be.
Darryl: Mike, you're a very brave man. I mean it takes courage just to be you. To get out of bed every single day, knowing full well you got to be you.
Michael Scott: Do you really mean that?
Darryl: I couldn't do it. I ain't that strong and I ain't that brave.
Michael Scott: I'm braver than you?
Darryl: Way braver. You Braveheart, man.

Andy: Good morning, Pam.
Pam: Oh, welcome back, Andy.
Andy: Drew. I'm Drew now.
Pam: Oh, Drew. Sorry.
Andy: Apology not accepted. Because it wasn't even necessary in the first place.