Pam: We found a great local daycare. It's rated really high by all the local parenting websites. But that means it's also really hard to get into.
Jim: Turns out, a lot of parents want the very best for their children. That's weird.
Pam: We're hoping our interview seals the deal.
Jim: But if not, there's always the army. The infantry.
Pam: Okay. Okay. Yeah.

Gabe: Most of our business comes from selling printers. So don't think of yourselves as paper salesmen anymore, but as printer salesmen who also sell paper.
Michael Scott: Perfect.
[aside to camera:]
Michael Scott: No. Don't like that.

Meredith: Hey, who the hell's going through our stuff?
Gabe: Actually, that's Nick. He's your new IT guy. Uh, he's setting up a site blocker. Mostly blocking the inappropriate sites. And then there are the time-wasting sites like Twitter, YouTube. We are blocking those as well.
[aside to camera:]
Michael Scott: Mm, nope. Don't like that.

Gabe: Okay, did everyone get one? With these bottles, we eliminate the need for plastic water bottles, which are the scourge of the environment.
Michael Scott: We'll still get to use the little cups, though, right?
Gabe: Little cups? Like paper or plastic or... ?
Michael Scott: I don't know what they're made of.
Dwight K. Schrute: They're 2 ounce paper cups dipped in plastic. He goes through 20 a day.
Gabe: Okay, well, I bet you can fit 20 little cups of water in your aluminum bottle.
Michael Scott: You know what can't fit in a bottle, are the 20 little trips I take to the cooler, and the 20 little scans I do of everybody to make sure everything's running smoothly. And the 20 little conversations that I have with Stanley.
Stanley: That's okay.

Michael Scott: I don't want to appear ungrateful for everything Sabre's doing for us.
Gabe: Oh, I don't get that sense at all from you, so...
Michael Scott: Well, you should have a little. But it's great that you don't, because I am trying to embrace all of these changes, but I'm- I'll be honest, I'm having trouble wrapping my head around a couple of 'em.
Gabe: Which ones?
Michael Scott: Ah. All of them.

Michael Scott: Okay. I feel very strongly that you can't just come in here and change everything that people have been doing forever. Is Christian Slater back there? Because... he knows. He'd know what to do.

Michael Scott: I have come here today to talk to Mr. David Wallace about this whole thing going on with Sabre. He will know exactly what to do. He is not a big fan of me dropping by announced. But then again, who is?

Michael Scott: Well, that's not the David Wallace that I remember. [as Michael reverses out of the driveway, Wallace follows him waving] That is some sort of weird creature that lives in David Wallace's house. Oh, my God. All right. Just get me out of here.

Michael Scott: You know when people say getting fired was the best thing that ever happened to them? I feel sorry for those people. That's the best thing? Really? G-uh.

Jo: [on video chat] Hey, Buddy. Is it something I said?
Michael Scott: Hello. No. My name's Michael Scott. Hello.
Jo: Oh, hello, Mr. Scott. Pleased to meet you.
Michael Scott: Nice to meet you. We are very excited about the merger with Sabre. I think you have a great accent.
Jo: Aw, thank you. I've been working on it since I was a little girl. To, um, to what do I owe the pleasure of this video chat?
Michael Scott: Well, I am little concerned with all of these changes, to be quite frank. I think we have done things a certain way here at Dunder Mifflin for quite some time, and-
Jo: Pardon. Pardon me, Mr. Scott, but the last time I saw a company as mismanaged as Dunder Mifflin, it was my grandson's snowball company, so you'll excuse me if I prefer that you all adapt to the way that we do things.