Michael Scott: I miss the old Dunder Mifflin. Too much change is not a good thing. Ask the climate.

Michael Scott: There is a small part of me that is actually very excited about this new company. But 70 percent of me is water, and the other part - the real part - the part that has feelings and emotions and thoughts and makes decisions and, if I can be crass, makes babies, that part thinks that all of these changes suck ba-

Christian Slater: So you've just been bought by Sabre. You've probably got a lot of questions. Hi. I'm Christian Slater. What's it like to work for Sabre? Let's find out together. Working at Sabre means taking on the challenge of the road that rises to meet you. Sabre is respecting the past, but opening a window to the future. Have you ever tasted a rainbow? At Sabre, you will.
Jo: You'll find it easy to embrace the Sabre spirit. Welcome. We're very excited to go on this journey with you.
[aside to camera:]
Jim: [Christian Slater impression] So you've been shown a nonsensical video. You're probably wondering, "What's going on?" Well, you're not alone.

David: Hey, you know, if you want, I'm sure I can get Arnie on board if you wanted to join us for Suck It. Work together again.
Michael Scott: The what?
David: Suck It. That's what it's called.
Michael Scott: Oh, okay.
David: Huh? Catchy. Kids'll love it.
Michael Scott: Like it.
[aside to camera:]
Michael Scott: There are very few things that would make me not want to team up with David Wallace. And Suck It is one of 'em.

Michael Scott: Dunder Mifflin was recently bought by an electronics company named Sabre. ["sob-ray"] They stepped in at the 11th hour, and they saved our asses. Although David Wallace said that we were the one branch that was actually working right, so we probably could have saved our own asses. We didn't need them touching our asses.

David: I want to tell you about a business idea I have.
Michael Scott: Okay.
David: Okay? You know how kids leave their toys everywhere? Okay. So this is a vacuum. It's like a shop-vac type of thing. [vacuum noise] Teaches kids how to pick up their own toys. Right? Baseball gloves, hackysacks, drumsticks. [sucking noise] Picks it up!
Michael Scott: So the kid's making the noise to pick it up?
David: No. No, no, no. That's the- That's the vacuum noise.
Michael Scott: Oh, okay.
David: You- You don't like it?
Michael Scott: No, I think it is-
David: No, it's okay. Another guy from Dunder Mifflin, Arnie from Research, he's gonna draw up the prototype. And, uh... It's like shop-vac. [sucking noise] Did I say that?
Michael Scott: Yep.

Michael Scott: Wow. Oh, yummy. You have got the life, my friend.
David: Yeah.
Michael Scott: Can I just stay here and never go back?
David: Things not going so well there?
Michael Scott: Oh, man. How much time do you have?
David: I have a doctor's appointment next Thursday.

Erin: Guys, um, who's Gabe? This note says to put the box aside for Gabe Lewis, who's coming tomorrow?
[later:]
Michael Scott: Okay, everybody, listen up. I have some bad news. Due to circumstances beyond my control-
Dwight K. Schrute: Impulsivity and inattention to detail.
Michael Scott: Hey, hey. I have opened a box, which should not have been opened...
Dwight K. Schrute: Terrible mistake.
Michael Scott: And distributed things which should not have been distributed.
Dwight K. Schrute: Undistributable.
Pam: Well, maybe we can put the box back together.
Dwight K. Schrute: Impossible. He opened it like an ape.

Michael Scott: Gabe seems tall. Hope we get along. Had a very good thing going with David Wallace. He was a good guy. He was somebody I could trust. Here he is. [holding up photo of him and Wallace] You can really see that he is okay taking a picture with me. Even though I was there for disciplinary reasons.

Andy & Erin: [singing, Andy playing guitar to the tune of Miley Cyrus's "Party in the USA"] Hopped off the train in Scranton, PA, another cloudy gray afternoon. Jumped in the cab, here you are for the first time, look to the right see the "Electric City" sign. This is gonna be good day, for Dunder Mifflin and Sob-ray. Sab- [guitar stops]
Michael Scott: Saber.
Andy: Saber. [sings] Dunder Mifflin and Saber. So yeah, yeah, yay, yay.
Andy & Erin: Dunder Mifflin is a part of Sob-ray. So yeah, yeah, yay, yay. Dunder Mifflin is a part of Sabre. [music stops]
Andy: You sure it's saber?