Harry: Listen, Robert, I don't have time. There's a big client in play. Prestige direct mail solutions–
Dwight K. Schrute: Don't listen to him.
Harry: Used to be Binghamton's–
Dwight K. Schrute: Nope.
Harry: I want it, it's mine.
Dwight K. Schrute: Prestige is ours. Okay, they're responsible for half of the junk mail on the eastern seaboard. We get them. We already put a call into them, Robert.
Harry: We need you to make a decision.
Dwight K. Schrute: Make a decision.
Robert: I have decided. Neither of you are to have any contact with either Prestige or any other Binghamton client until I have figured out how to divide things up. As Solomon once said...

Robert: I was looking over your projections, and I think we can do better.
Andy: Are you factoring in... the whole national economy... declining and all that?
Robert: Andy, do you know why I chose you?
Andy: I think I can sum it up with what I think is your favorite ice cream flavor... vanilla?
Robert: Vanilla? No, no, no, no. You'll never guess in a million, billion years, you'll never guess.

Robert: You like her.
Andy: I do.
Robert: She likes you.
Andy: You know, we've both been into each other at different times and just never really synced up. Now we're in this weird dance-
Robert: I'm afraid you've lost my interest.

Robert: [on the phone] Andrew, I've picked up two possible gifts to bring this afternoon. One, a pot of marmalade.
Andy: Ooh, that sounds great.
Robert: Well, that, that is what you want then, the marmalade?
Andy: Sure.
Robert: You don't want to hear the other one. You love marmalade.
Andy: Uh, I'll hear the other one.
Robert: It's a basil plant.
Andy: You know, the marmalade sounds great.
Robert: I also mentioned the marmalade to my sister and she's very interested.
Andy: Then the basil will be fine.
Robert: Well, you clearly want the marmalade. Uh, Gretchen, I need another marmalade. Alright. [hangs up]

Andy: Hey, I want you to meet my first bosses, Mom and Dad.
Robert: Yes, hello. Nice to meet you.
Walter: Pleasure.
Robert: Andy, where shall I put your basil plant?
Andy: Oh, I thought you were going to bring marmalade.
Robert: No, I'm certain you said basil.

Andy: Hey! Uh-oh, looks like we're under a Jack attack!
Robert: Yes, Andrew. And you, on this day of fantasy, are a laborer.

Robert: Okay, enough of this. I mean, really, enough. It's gotten way out of hand. Andrew, this is my wife. Whatever privacy you were trying to protect between us, I thank you for. But it is not welcome right now. Just be honest.
Susan: Andy?
Andy: Yes?
Susan: Why do you keep looking at my husband?
Robert: Andy, just answer the question.
Andy: No games?
Robert: No games.
Andy: Okay. I mean, it was kind of funny, actually. Robert storms in and he says, "in four seconds, my wife's gonna be in here. I told her she could work here. Under no circumstances can that be allowed to happen." [laughs]
Robert: You lying son of a bitch!

Robert: Yes, that's it. Push yourselves, boys. It's not a party if you don't do something that scares you. I need a breather. Oh. Oh. You two keep going.
Ryan: Hey, he's asleep. We can just leave.
Gabe: So leave.

Darryl: [in the bathroom with Robert] Yeah, I guess sometimes I have nightmares about being buried alive.
[later:]
Meredith: [talking to Robert] Honestly, Jim gives me the creeps.
[aside to camera:]
Robert: What am I up to?

Robert: When I come back next week and this report shows me no mistakes, we can talk about names all day. Our favorite names, silly made up names, normal names said in a silly voice. Wouldn't that be nice?
Andy: I would like that.
Robert: End the mistakes. That is all I ask. [gets up from chair] And you can't have a favorite Iron Chef. It depends entirely on the secret ingredient. Sometimes I feel you don't know food at all.