Ryan Quote #135

Quote from Ryan in Garage Sale

Ryan: My mom makes the best pesto in the world. And I always tell her, "Mom, you should sell this, you'd make a fortune", and she always says, "No, it's just for family." Well, finally I was like [bleep] it, I'll sell it. So I'm like, "Mom, I need you to make a ton of pesto for a pesto party for all my friends", and she's like, "Uh, okay." Pesto party? Really? Anyway, she makes like a hundred bottles worth. It's so good. And Phyllis just had that mom look I wanted.


 ‘Garage Sale’ Quotes

Quote from Kevin

Andy: Oh, my gosh. You have the Dallas board game?
Kevin: Yeah, when I was a kid I was on Dallas.
Andy: Really?
Kevin: Yeah. We missed our connecting flight and we spent the entire day on Dallas. Then we spent a week on Hawaii. I was on heaven.

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute

Dwight K. Schrute: Schrutes are farmers by hobby and traders by trade. Through the art of the swap, I will walk out of this garage sale with the finest item here.

Quote from Michael Scott

[The employees are all gathered in the kitchen holding candles]
Holly: Hi guys.
Michael Scott: This is where our love faces its toughest test. After this, its just smooth sailing for the rest of our lives.
Jim: Holly, will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Stanley: Marry me, Holly.
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: That guy's got more than he can handle as it is.
Oscar: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: That marriage would be a sham.
Gabe: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: Easy no.
Angela: Will you marry me?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: That would be hot. I would pay to see that.
Ryan: Will you marry me, Holly?
Holly: No.
Michael Scott: Only one that I was kind of worried about.
[Michael opens the door to the annex, which is decked out with candles, especially Holly's desk]
Michael Scott: This is where I fell in love with you. And this is where I ask you to marry me. It started with.. [fire sprinklers go on, they both start laughing; as Yoda:] Holly Flax, marrying me will you be?
Holly: Your wife becoming me will I.

 Ryan Howard Quotes

Quote from Initiation

Dwight K. Schrute: Brain teaser. I have two coins, totaling 15 cents. One of them is not a nickel. What are they?
Ryan: A dime and a nickel.
Dwight K. Schrute: No. I said one of them is not a nickel.
Ryan: But the other one is. I've heard that before.
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay. A man and his son get into a car accident. They are rushed to the hospital. The doctor says, "There is no way I can operate on this boy",
Ryan: "Because he's my son." The doctor is the boy's mother.
Dwight K. Schrute: A man is found hanging from the ceiling-
Ryan: He stepped on a block of ice, hung himself and the ice melted.
Dwight K. Schrute: A hunter-
Ryan: It's a polar bear, because you're at the North Pole.

Quote from Search Committee

Ryan: I want an outsider.
Jim: Perfect. There are several outside candidates that we think would be really-
Ryan: No, I mean an outsider. Like someone on the margins of society, who doesn't see things the way we do, like a homeless person.
Pam: A homeless person. Really? A homeless person.
Ryan: No, you're right, Pam, let's just leave him to the welfare system and let that handle it.
Pam: No, I want you to say that you think the best person to be our new manager is a homeless person.
Ryan: Let me guess who you want, Pam. Rachael Ray? The ladies of The View?
[aside to camera:]
Ryan: I got away with everything under the last boss, and it wasn't good for me, at all. So, I want guidance. I want leadership. But don't just, like, boss me around, you know? Like, lead me. Lead me... when I'm in the mood... to be led.

Quote from Whistleblower

Ryan: Wuphf is a site that I'm launching to be the last word in social networking. For just $12.99 a month, Wuphf links up all your communication portals so you are always within reach. It's part of the dog pack, as I call it. But, look, why tell you when I can show you. [types on his phone] I just sent myself a Wuphf. [fax machine starts printing, windows pop up on Ryan's computer with "woof" sounds]
Erin: [on phone] Ryan, you have a Wuphf on line 1.
Ryan: Thank you, Erin. Wuphf!