Dwight K. Schrute Quote #832
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Todd Packer
Jim: I really think we should join forces on this one.
Dwight K. Schrute: Really.
Jim: What do we think, what would drive him crazy?
Dwight K. Schrute: I know.
Jim: Here we go.
Dwight K. Schrute: Pepto-Bismol, in his hot chocolate.
Jim: You've got to stop with the hot chocolate stuff. I was thinking we can jam his drawers, so they only comes out two inches, and that way you can see everything in them but you can't get to them.
Dwight K. Schrute: Does Edgar Allan Poe know about that one? So sinister! That wouldn't annoy a person at all! Where do you come up with this stuff?
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‘Todd Packer’ Quotes
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Pam: I got Erin a new computer, because the one at reception sucked. I should know. And I don't wanna say the other one was old, but its I.P. number was one! [laughs cautiously] Right?
Quote from Holly
Holly: I'm sorry about your friend.
Michael Scott: Nah, he's an ass.
Holly: [Brahmin accent] You are.
Michael Scott: [Brahmin accent] You are.
Holly: What are you wicked smart?
Michael Scott: No you are.
Holly: Who are?
Michael Scott: [kisses her, speaks normally] You are.
Dwight K. Schrute Quotes
Quote from Dunder Mifflin Infinity
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm going to live for a very long time. My grandma Schrute lived to be 101. My grandpa Mannheim is 103, and still puttering around down in Argentina. I tried to go visit him once but my travel visa was protested by the Shoah Foundation.
Quote from The Farm
Erin: Dwight, what a ridiculous, fancy clown you are.
Dwight K. Schrute: I am dressed according to the Schrute codes of mourning. My aunt Shirley has died.
Pam: Oh, Dwight. I'm so sorry. Were you guys close?
Dwight K. Schrute: I would say that she raised me, but let's not kid each other. I raised myself. She was, however, the closest thing I had to a mother.
[aside to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: My actual mother was very cold and distant. I'd say she was the closest thing I had to an aunt.