Dwight K. Schrute Quote #587

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in The Promotion

Dwight K. Schrute: I deserved that promotion, not Jim. Oh, man. Makes me want to put him in a triangle choke hold and force him down to the ground and just keep pressing and pressing. And then flip him over and then put him in a hammer lock! And he's gasping, he's panting! Every last breath! And the crowd is going crazy. And boom! I emerge victorious! [claps hands and stands up] Aha! $18,000 and a chance at the title! Ooh hah!
Erin: Dwight, Jim wants you to keep it down.

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 ‘The Promotion’ Quotes

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute

Dwight K. Schrute: People are starting to notice how terrible Jim is. It's great. Eventually, they'll rise up and revolt. My only hope is that they do it sooner rather than later. If the people here were our founding fathers, the Revolutionary War would have been delayed ten years. Because Stanley Washington was napping. And Phyllis Hancock was still signing the declaration. And Kevin Jefferson was distracted by a butterfly.

Quote from Jim

Jim: I've been studying Michael for years, and I've condensed what I've learned into this chart. How Michael spends his time. As you can see, we have procrastinating and distracting others, and this tiny sliver here is critical thinking. I made it bigger, so that you could see it.

Quote from Oscar

Oscar: Look, it doesn't take a genius to know that any organization thrives when it has two leaders. Go ahead, name a country that doesn't have two presidents. A boat that sets sail without two captains. Where would Catholicism be without the popes?