Dwight K. Schrute Quote #152
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Drug Testing
Dwight K. Schrute: Have you ever taken any illegal drugs?
Oscar: No, I have not.
Dwight K. Schrute: Do you think it's possible that maybe you could have had some drugs in your system without you knowing about it?
Oscar: What are you implying?
Dwight K. Schrute: Have you ever pooped a balloon?
The Office Quotes
‘Drug Testing’ Quotes
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: I like the people I work with, generally, with four exceptions. But someone committed a crime, and I did not become a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriff's deputy to make friends. And by the way, I haven't.
Quote from Jim
Jim: I'm just saying that you can't be sure that it wasn't you.
Dwight K. Schrute: That's ridiculous. Of course it wasn't me.
Jim: Marijuana is a memory loss drug, so maybe you just don't remember.
Dwight K. Schrute: I would remember.
Jim: Well, how could you if it just erased your memory?
Dwight K. Schrute: That's not how it works.
Jim: Now, how do you know how it works?
Dwight K. Schrute: Knock it off, okay? I'm interviewing you.
Jim: No! You said I'd be conducting the interview when I walked in here. Now, exactly how much pot did you smoke?