Toby Quote #101
Quote from Toby in Dwight Christmas
Toby: You know who's not gonna get to work on some exciting new startup this year? George Howard Scubb, a.k.a. the alleged Scranton Strangler, because he's in prison for something he may not have done.
Nellie: I'm sorry, the--Uh, the Scranton who?
Toby: The Scranton strangler. George Howard Skub. Haven't I told you about the jury I was on a couple years ago?
Nellie: [gasps] Oh, what happened? I mean, if you can talk about it, obviously. Because if you can't, I mean, I understand.
Toby: I- I could... I could talk about it.
Stanley: [pats Nellie on the shoulder as he walks out] See you next Christmas.
Toby: I could, sure. Have a seat. I would start at the beginning, but I think I need to go farther back.
Features in the collection: The Scranton Strangler.
The Office Quotes
‘The Scranton Strangler’
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Ultimatum
Man: Next up, secretary Schrute will read the minutes from Sunday's meeting.
Dwight K. Schrute: Minutes from previous meeting of Knights of the Night. No, Jim, hey!
Jim: Oh.
Dwight K. Schrute: This meeting is for Knights of the Night only.
[later, to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: Knights of the Night are volunteer crime patrollers. We're often compared to the Guardian Angels, but we could not be more different from them. Seriously, we are nothing like the Guardian Angels. I mean, broad strokes purposes, sure. Think Guardian Angels. One of our many recent good deeds? We set out to capture the Scranton Strangler. Mission accomplished. Not by us.
Quote from Michael Scott in Classy Christmas
Michael Scott: Man, I worked hard. I worked so hard for this! I was after corporate constantly. I emailed Jo. I wrote letters. And, know who I end up owing this to is the Scranton Strangler. Thank you. Thank you, Scranton Strangler. I love you! You just took one more person's breath away.
‘Dwight Christmas’ Quotes
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: In a head-to-head contest, people prefer Belsnickel over Santa every time. There aren't as many songs about him, but I attribute that more to rhyming difficulties. My brother and I wrote one once. It was about a fickle pickle salesman who would tickle you for a nickel.
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: Or, who was it that suggested the authentic Pennsylvania Dutch Christmas? I think it was someone really popular.
Phyllis: We already said no.
Angela: No, no, no.
Nellie: Too weird.
[aside to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: This is me and my family celebrating Pennsylvania Dutch Christmas in 1982 on the farm. There's me and my brother Jeb breaking the ceremonial pig rib. He doesn't come back for Christmas anymore. The sepia tint is from an app on my phone. This is the same photo, matrix style.
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: [plays a trumpet] And Pennsylvania Dutch Christmas has officially begun.
Meredith: Ugh. What is this stuff, lava?
Dwight K. Schrute: That is gluhwein, otherwise known as glow-wine, also used to sterilize medical instruments. And, interesting factoid, this is the very spoon that guided my soft skull through the birth canal when I was born. Enjoy.