Jim Quote #568
Dwight K. Schrute: Jim, get ready for the battle of your life.
Jim: Done. Explain.
Dwight K. Schrute: The new guys. Dwight Jr. is after my job. Yeah. There is a shark hiding inside that adorable little cherub.
Jim: Oh, now I get what Pete was talking about at the sales meeting yesterday.
Dwight K. Schrute: Wait, sales? What sales meeting?
Jim: The new guys called one.
Dwight K. Schrute: The new guys called a sales meeting?
Jim: Clark ended the whole thing with a karate demonstration. Did you know there was a belt above black?
Dwight K. Schrute: There's no belt above black. Is there a belt above black?
Jim: You should ask him. It's a color you would never expect. [Dwight storms off] Too easy.
The Office Quotes
‘New Guys’ Quotes
Quote from Creed
Creed: In the parking lot today there was a circus. The copier did tricks on the high-wire, a lady tried to give away a baby that looked like a cat. There was a Dwight impersonator and a Jim impersonator; a strong man crushed a turtle. I laughed and I cried. Not bad for a day in the life of a dog food company.
Quote from Kevin
Kevin: Oh, what a summer! An emotional roller-coaster. I ran over a turtle in the parking lot, but then I saved him by gluing his shell back together. But I'm not that good at puzzles. So I patched him with stuff from around the office. But I couldn't get the pieces to fit right. Then, one day, when I was reaching for the glue, I crushed his shell again. But I rebuilt him even better that time. But it turned out the turtle was already dead. Probably when I ran over him the first time.
Quote from Kevin
Angela: Well, I need to give my cat up for adoption.
Kevin: The one who uses the doorbell, or the one with the Mexican hat, or the one with the rain galoshes, or the one you let go around naked?
[aside to camera:]
Kevin: Angela's cats are cute. So cute that you just want to eat them. But you can't eat cats. You can't eat cats, Kevin.