Dwight K. Schrute Quote #954
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Christmas Wishes
Dwight K. Schrute: Ah! I've been attacked! Oh, my God! Oh! Someone put a porcupine in my drawer!
Toby: Oh, my God.
Dwight K. Schrute: Yeah, I was just sitting here at my desk and I, I reached into my drawer to grab my toothbrush and some tooth powder and- and all of a sudden I was attacked by this blood thirsty rabid creature!
Jim: I wonder, in this office, who has access to a porcupine?
Dwight K. Schrute: Or who in this office knows that I have access and is trying to set me up?
Jim: Hmm...
The Office Quotes
‘Christmas Wishes’ Quotes
Quote from Stanley
Andy: Who's excited to get their holiday wishes?
Stanley: "Holiday wishes."
Andy: What's that, Stanley?
Stanley: We know exactly what holiday you're referring to.
Andy: It is important to be mindful of all belief systems at our holiday party.
Stanley: I've been here eighteen years and have suffered through some weird thematic Christmases. A Honolulu Christmas, A Pulp Fiction Christmas, A Muslim Christmas, Moroccan Christmas. Mo-rocca Christmas. I don't want it. Christmas is Christmas is Christmas is Christmas.
Quote from Stanley
Stanley: I don't want no Kwanza wreath. I don't need a dreidel in my face, that's its own thing. And who's that black Santa for?! I don't care! I know Santa ain't black! I could care less. I want Christmas! Just give me plain baby Jesus, lying in a manger, Christmas!
Quote from Toby
Toby: You know this sounds a lot like the premise of my latest Chad Flendermen novel. A murder for framing.
[aside to camera:]
Toby: Chad Flendermen. Just an easy going black guy, he knows the streets, yet he also went to Oxford. So... Just as comfortable on a motorcycle as he is on Air Force One. Oh and he's also the world's leading Egyptologist.
[back:]
Angela: Toby! Nobody cares about your sex-crazed black detective.
Toby: No, no, no, no, no. Women chase him. He misses his wife.