Pam: The thing about pregnancy is people treat you differently. Like you're a kid almost. They lose all sense of boundaries. They start acting weird, telling you things that clearly aren't true. I know it sounds nuts, but I think Dwight is the only one who's telling me the truth.

Dwight K. Schrute: Does your husband have very soft erections? Because if not, I just grabbed a very soft penis for nothing.

Dwight K. Schrute: Psst. We're not here. [slips a Toblerone to Creed]
Creed: Who said that?
Dwight K. Schrute: Exactly.
Creed: How'd I get this long triangle?