Dwight K. Schrute Quote #878
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Search Committee
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay! If you're not going to interview me, then I'll do it.
Jim: Yes.
Dwight K. Schrute: What will be your first priority? I will have seven first priorities. Safety, profits, fostering a community of self-reliance and entrepreneurship, listening, respect for human life, bolstering our public image, and... getting everyone home on time. Dwight, let me be frank. In an accident that no one can blame you for, an antique gun was discharged while you were acting manager. How are we ever to trust you again? [whispering] That's a great question. I am going to institute a strict no-firearms policy for this office that extends to myself as well. Wow. All of my concerns are disappearing.
Jim: Thank you, Dwight.
Dwight K. Schrute: Thank you. [clears throat and gets up] You'll be hearing from us shortly, Mr. Schrute, and I think you're gonna like the call you're going to receive. [smiles] Oh, come on. I'm just happy that I got this meeting.
The Office Quotes
‘Search Committee’ Quotes
Quote from Robert
Toby: How will your experience selling refinery equipment translate to our smaller scale here?
Robert: You don't work in sales, do you?
Toby: Uh, human resources.
Robert: You see, I sit across from a man. I see his face. I see his eyes. Now, does it matter if he wants a hundred dollars of paper or a hundred million dollars of deep-sea drilling equipment? Don't be a fool. He wants respect. He wants love. He wants to be younger. He wants to be attractive. There is no such thing as a product. Don't ever think there is. There is only... sex. Everything... is sex. You understand that what I'm telling you is a universal truth... Toby?
Toby: Yes.
Quote from Darryl
Darryl: Think about it! What other mammal, besides humans, drinks the milk of another mammal? I mean, you don't see a bear drinking raccoon milk.
Quote from Kelly
Kelly: What was that?
Gabe: We just have a lot of serious candidates to get through today, so...
Kelly: Am I not a serious candidate?
Gabe: What do you want me to say? I mean, there's a line of qualified people out there. We have a video CV from England. [to Jim and Toby] Are we all just gonna pretend to-- okay. [to Kelly] Um, what are your weaknesses?
Kelly: I don't have any, ass[bleep].