Jim Quote #359
Jim: I just want to say how happy we are that all of you are here tonight. And I want to especially thank those of you who traveled from far away to be here with us tonight, especially the Florida cousins who, obviously, can't take a hint. [laughter] Four years ago, I was just a guy who had a crush on a girl who had a boyfriend. And I had to do the hardest thing that I've ever had to do, which was just to wait. Uh, don't get me wrong. I flirted with her. Pam, I can now admit in front of my friends and family that I do know how to make a photocopy. Didn't need your help that many times. And do you remember how long it took you to teach me how to drive a stick?
Pam: Like a year.
Jim: I've been driving stick since high school. So... yes, yes. For a really long time that's all I had. I just had little moments with a girl who saw me as friend. And a lot of people told me I was crazy to wait this long for a date with a girl who I worked with, but I think even then I knew that... I was waiting for my wife. So, I would like to propose a toast. So if you'd all raise your glasses. Not Pam, for obvious reasons, but everyone else. If you would raise your glasses
Meemaw: What's obvious? Why can't Pam drink?
Jim: Pam can't drink? I didn't- I shouldn't have said that. I don't know why I did. She can do whatever she wants, though she shouldn't. She shouldn't because she's an alcoholic. Pam is an alcoholic. That's not true. I- No. What we want- The real reason is that, um, that Pam's pregnant.
Features in the collection: Jim & Pam Quotes.
The Office Quotes
‘Jim & Pam Quotes’
Quote from Jim in Christmas Party
Jim: So this year, for the first time ever, I got Pam in Secret Santa, and I got her this teapot, which I know she really wants, so she can make tea at her desk. But I'm also gonna stuff it with some inside jokes. Like, this is my high school yearbook photo. She saw it at the party, and it really makes her laugh. Not sure why. What else? This is a hot sauce packet. She put this on a hot dog a couple years ago because she thought it was ketchup. And it was really funny, so I kept the other two. This would take a little too long to explain, so I won't. And this is the card. Because Christmas is the time to tell people how you feel.
Quote from Pam in Launch Party
Jim: Do you remember what you said to me on my first day at work, just before you walked me over to my desk?
Pam: Yeah. "Enjoy this moment, because you're never going to go back to this time before you met your desk-mate Dwight."
Jim: And that's when I knew. You?
Pam: You came up to my desk and you said, "This might sound weird, and there's no reason for me to know this, but that mixed berry yogurt you're about to eat has expired."
Jim: That was the moment that you knew you liked me?
Pam: Yep.
Jim: Wow. Can we make it a different moment?
Pam: Nope.
‘Niagara’ Quotes
Quote from Angela
Pam: Okay. All of these things are important to remember, but the most important thing is that no one say anything about my pregnancy at the wedding.
Jim: Absolutely. 'Cause not everyone knows and some people might be offended.
Angela: Decent people everywhere will be offended.
Pam: Well, we're thinking of my grandmother who we haven't told and is very old-fashioned.
Angela: Well, you're lucky you have a grandmother. Some of us have to be our own grandmothers.
Quote from Michael Scott
Michael Scott: [talking to an attractive woman] Toy Story, Finding Nemo, Up. I bawl the entire time. I can not watch Pixar.
Quote from Kevin
Kevin: I left a pair of dress shoes in a bag outside my door last night to be cleaned and polished, but they haven't been returned yet.
Front Desk Clerk: You must be Mr. Malone. One moment please.
Kevin: Thank you.
Front Desk Clerk: [whispers to manager] Sir, it's the man with the shoes.
Hotel Manager: Mr. Malone, your shoes are gone.
Kevin: They were stolen?
Hotel Manager: No, destroyed.
Kevin: What?
Hotel Manager: When the bag was opened by our shoe shine, the smell overcame him. I too smelled them and made the choice that they must be thrown away. Incinerated actually.
Kevin: But that was my only pair of shoes.
Hotel Manager: It became a safety issue, sir.
Kevin: Well... Well, damn it.
Front Desk Clerk: I can offer you a complimentary breakfast.
Kevin: Okay.