Michael Scott Quote #1343
Quote from Michael Scott in Stress Relief
David: Look, this is very serious offense. We have cause to fire you.
Michael Scott: [to the lawyer] Can you shove down? Instead... shove down, please. [to Dwight] Instead, what I think we should do is strip of your title as safety officer.
Dwight K. Schrute: No.
Michael Scott: We should take a part of his pay and donate it the charity of your choice. Something that Dwight doesn't like.
Dwight K. Schrute: PETA.
David: Michael, you have to take responsibility here. One of your employees had a heart attack. He could have died, because of the way that you are allowing your office to run. Do you want that on your conscious?
Michael Scott: [to Dwight] Do you?
David: Michael?
Michael Scott: You talking to me?
The Office Quotes
‘Stress Relief’ Quotes
Quote from Michael Scott
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh, come on. It's not real, Stanley. Don't have a heart attack.
Michael Scott: No, no, no! You will not die! Stanley! Stanley! You will not die! Stanley! Stanley! Barack is president! You are black, Stanley!
Quote from Michael Scott
CPR Trainer: All right, well, lets get back to it. 'Cause you're losing him. Okay, too fast. Everyone, we need to pump at a pace of a 100 beats per minute .
Michael Scott: Okay, that's uh, hard to keep track. How many is that per hour?
Jim: How's that gonna help you?
Michael Scott: Well, I will divide and then count to it.
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: It's very unusual for Michael not to show up to work. My guess? He's either deeply depressed, or an icicle has snapped off his roof and impaled his brain. He has this terrible habit of standing directly underneath them and staring up at them. And I always say, "Michael, take two steps back, and stare at the icicle from the side." And he's like, "No, I like the way they look from standing directly underneath them."