Dwight K. Schrute Quote #146

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Drug Testing

Dwight K. Schrute: Let's go over some of these symptoms of marijuana use, shall we? You tell me who this sounds like. Slow moving, inattentive, dull, constantly snacking, shows a lack of motivation.
Kevin: Hey.

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 ‘Drug Testing’ Quotes

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute

Dwight K. Schrute: I like the people I work with, generally, with four exceptions. But someone committed a crime, and I did not become a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriff's deputy to make friends. And by the way, I haven't.

Quote from Jim

Jim: I'm just saying that you can't be sure that it wasn't you.
Dwight K. Schrute: That's ridiculous. Of course it wasn't me.
Jim: Marijuana is a memory loss drug, so maybe you just don't remember.
Dwight K. Schrute: I would remember.
Jim: Well, how could you if it just erased your memory?
Dwight K. Schrute: That's not how it works.
Jim: Now, how do you know how it works?
Dwight K. Schrute: Knock it off, okay? I'm interviewing you.
Jim: No! You said I'd be conducting the interview when I walked in here. Now, exactly how much pot did you smoke?

Quote from Jim

Jim: [imitating Stanley] I enjoy the tangy zip of Miracle Whip.