Dwight K. Schrute Quote #792
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in China
[As Dwight picks up a pencil between his toes]
Dwight K. Schrute: Twenty minutes a day Jim, that's all it takes. Twenty minutes a day, all feet, no hands and I'll have the pedi-dexterity of a chimp, and you'll be sitting there like an idiot. [attempts to place pencil in pencil sharpener] Okay. Here we go. Ah, yes. [knocks items over onto Pam's desk]
Pam: Do you mind?
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm sorry, Pam, allow me to write you an apology letter.
Pam: You don't have to do that.
Dwight K. Schrute: [typing with his toes] D-E-A. Oops, backspace. A. Dear.
Jim: [places a cup of coffee on Dwight's desk] Ah, thank you hands. Nothing else in the universe can do what you do.
Dwight K. Schrute: [lifts cup up with toes]
Jim: Oh, don't worry about it. Dwight, its okay. You were wrong.
Dwight K. Schrute: [spills hot coffee all over himself] Uh, argh!
Jim: Well, A for effort right?
Dwight K. Schrute: [gives Jim a high five with his foot]
More The Office Quotes
Quote from Erin
Erin: What if we all get together and help each other and hire a new guy, and then we all kill him, but first we take out like a hundred thousand dollar life insurance policy. I bet you guys like that idea don't you?
[aside to camera:]
Erin: I think that's what they're doing to me. I can't prove it, but I wanted to see their faces when I said it. I learned nothing.
Quote from Dwight K. Schrute
Dwight K. Schrute: Owning a building is a war between the landlord and the tenant. Not a literal war, unfortunately, but I am using the same tactics. I've surrounded the enemy, and I'm slowly starving them. To save on electricity I've installed a timer and motion sensors on the lights. It's part of my green initiative. And by green, I mean money.
Dwight K. Schrute Quotes
Quote from Dunder Mifflin Infinity
Dwight K. Schrute: I'm going to live for a very long time. My grandma Schrute lived to be 101. My grandpa Mannheim is 103, and still puttering around down in Argentina. I tried to go visit him once but my travel visa was protested by the Shoah Foundation.
Quote from The Farm
Erin: Dwight, what a ridiculous, fancy clown you are.
Dwight K. Schrute: I am dressed according to the Schrute codes of mourning. My aunt Shirley has died.
Pam: Oh, Dwight. I'm so sorry. Were you guys close?
Dwight K. Schrute: I would say that she raised me, but let's not kid each other. I raised myself. She was, however, the closest thing I had to a mother.
[aside to camera:]
Dwight K. Schrute: My actual mother was very cold and distant. I'd say she was the closest thing I had to an aunt.