The Office Quote of the Day

Tuesday, December 1, 2020

Quote from Jim in Goodbye, Toby

Dwight K. Schrute: Okay, fine, I'll just let it go to voice mail.
Jim: [on headset] Hello, this is Dwight.
Pam: Hey, is this Dwight?
Jim: Yes, it is.
Pam: Oh, my goodness, you sound sexy.
Jim: Oh, thank you. I've been working out.
Dwight K. Schrute: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Pam! Pam! You are not talking to Dwight right now. You're talking to Jim.
Pam: Dwight?
Dwight K. Schrute: No! Pam, I'm over here.
Pam: I'm confused.
Dwight K. Schrute: Disconnect that right now. You give me your earpiece.
Jim: I can't do that. Unsanitary.

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Recent Quotes

Monday, November 30, 2020

Quote from Michael Scott in Did I Stutter?

Michael Scott: Today's a very special day for me. And it's really not about me. It's about my grandkids. It's about my great-grandkids. I can come back here when I'm 100, and I can find that piece of cement and say, "That's me. Look, kids. Your daddy left that facehole." I don't know. It's a good feeling.

Sunday, November 29, 2020

Quote from Michael Scott in Employee Transfer

Michael Scott: Halfway? You know what I want to do? I want to pull over and find a little bed and breakfast for when we meet in the middle. Emphasis on the bed. And the breakfast.

Saturday, November 28, 2020

Quote from Andy in Traveling Salesmen / The Return

Andy: So Michael had a little chat with corporate and they decided to send me to management training. Anger management, technically, but still, management material. This whole thing's supposed to take ten weeks. I expect to be done in five. How? Name repetition, personality mirroring and positive reinforcement through nods and smiles. So don't worry about old Andy Bernard. I'll be back. Just like Rambo.

Friday, November 27, 2020

Quote from Stanley in Boys and Girls

Ryan: You know what? We could get this done a lot quicker if we formed a type of assembly line.
Stanley: This here is a "run out the clock" situation. Just like upstairs.

Thursday, November 26, 2020

Quote from Michael Scott in The Negotiation

Darryl: You ready for me?
Michael Scott: Yes, yeah. Absolutely. Have a seat. You know what, actually, let's go into the conference room.
Darryl: Okay.
Michael Scott: No, you know what, let's stay here. Let's go. Yeah, let's go to the conference room.
[aside to camera:]
Michael Scott: Tactic number six. Change the location of the meeting at the last second. Totally throws them off.

Wednesday, November 25, 2020

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute in Pam's Replacement

Dwight K. Schrute: Does your husband have very soft erections? Because if not, I just grabbed a very soft penis for nothing.

Upcoming Quotes

Wednesday, December 2, 2020

A quote from Dwight K. Schrute in the episode The Delivery.

Thursday, December 3, 2020

A quote from Dwight K. Schrute in the episode Women's Appreciation.

Friday, December 4, 2020

A quote from Michael Scott in the episode Email Surveillance.

Saturday, December 5, 2020

A quote from Michael Scott in the episode Viewing Party.

Sunday, December 6, 2020

A quote from Michael Scott in the episode Hot Girl.