TV Quotes

Oscar: Hey guys, I just found another promo. It's in Danish. I guess it's gonna start airing in Denmark.
Pam: Oh my god!
[After they watch the Danish promo:]
Kevin: What was that word they said when they showed me "Skrald mand"? What's that mean in Danish? Cool guy?
Oscar: Dumpster Man.
Kevin: Cool. Superhero.

Dwight K. Schrute: Yesterday, I was dispatched to Jim and Pam's house to find Pam's iPod. I searched everywhere, but I didn't find it. What I did find, was mold, and lots of it. So, I did what anyone would do. Read a book, had a bath, I got a good night's sleep, and I made plans to eradicate it. I also made plans to ask Jim where he bought his marvelous sheets. Time to get to work.

Jim: One day Michael came in complaining about a speed bump on the highway. I wonder who he ran over then.

Michael Scott: I enjoy having breakfast in bed. I like waking up to the smell of bacon. Sue me. And since I don't have a butler, I have to do it myself. So, most nights before I go to bed, I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman grill. Then go to sleep. When I wake up, I plug in the grill. I go back to sleep again. Then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon. It is delicious. It's good for me. It's a perfect way to start the day. Today, I got up, I stepped onto the grill, and it clamped down on my foot. That's it. I don't see what's so hard to believe about that.

Andy: I found the best "tentist" on the east coast. He personally tented Giuliani's first and third weddings. And I got him. I got him!

Michael Scott: I suppose summer had to end sometime. It's sad, though, because I had a great summer. I got West Nile virus, lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. I stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected even though I peed on it. Saw Inception. Or at least I dreamt I did.

Jim: Threat Level: Midnight is the great lost film of Michael Scott.
Pam: We're all in it, from like years and years ago. It's like a home movie.
Jim: Yeah, if Michael Scott did your home movie!
Pam: Michael screened a work in progress for us, years ago, and it didn't go well. We thought it was a comedy. Everything pointed to it being a comedy.