Angela: This sounds ridiculous, I know, but some people say that I eat like a squirrel.
Phyllis: So now you're comparing yourself to a cute, tiny animal?

Meredith: Hey, let's watch this thing.
Jim: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Ok. Yeah. We're not watchin' this.
Oscar: How can we not watch this?
Jim: What happened to 'Do Not Mock'?
Phyllis: We're not mocking, we're watching.
Jim: That will inevitably lead to mocking. So...
Phyllis: Well, we'll deal with it as it comes.

Jim: Guys, listen. This was anonymous, all right? There is no way I could've given it to myself because I didn't even know who was on here. I just gave it to the employee with the highest overall score.
Angela: To my tally, you just won back your own parking spot, a vacation day, and a nice, tidy quarter of $1,000 from all of us.
Jim: Will everybody stop for a second, because obviously I'm not taking any of it. A mistake has been made and we'll figure it out. Second of all, there was no cash prize.
Angela: Yes!
Jim: Dwight?
Dwight K. Schrute: Yeah, you said "In an ideal world, there would be a cash prize." Isn't that what you said?
Jim: No, Dwight, I meant- Yes, in a perfect world, someone would get money. But-
Phyllis: Yeah, but in your perfect world, only you get money.

Michael Scott: What is that smell? Do you smell that? What is that? Like a sulfur deposit under here?
Pam: Michael, stop.
Michael Scott: No, I'm serious, we don't have to put up... Is it the dogs?
Pam: Michael...
Michael Scott: You know what, we don't have to deal with this. I am going to Google sulfur maps.
Dwight K. Schrute: Michael, it's Phyllis.
Michael Scott: No, this is geological.
Phyllis: I sent an email out to everyone in this area that this might be a side effect to my new allergy medication I'm on.
Michael Scott: Are you kidding me?
Phyllis: No.
Michael Scott: And you guys are okay with this?
Dwight K. Schrute: She sent an email.
Phyllis: I did.